Fear not for I have heard you.

[God]

Let us not be afraid of ***boats changes. Blue is my favorite color and I want you to experience the relaxed state it implies. The first bikini was blue. The first chopper was blue. The first silicone implant was blue. The first low neck see through blouse was blue. The first one way mirror was blue(ish.) The first hotpant was blue. The first hum job relieved the blues. The first pin stripe graphic on a single screw v-hull with a blown 502 was blue.
I apologize for Smurfs.
Say amen. I have spoken. You may carry on ***boat.

[dmontzsta]

Also if you have alot of sex, your ballls turn blue. :D

[topless]

I thought you abandoned us! Thank you you are here! :)

[copperrat20]

So God do you still perform miracles? Or do good things just happen when your in a good mood?

[91nordic29]

Also if you have alot of sex, your ballls turn blue. :D
i thought that happened because you THOUGHT you were going to have sex but didnt. :confused:

[God]

dmontzsta if you have a lot of sex your penis turns blue. If you do not have a lot of sex your balls turn blue. You will understand this once you get a promotion at Burger King and move out of your Mom's house.

[God]

There are no miracles. Only Miracle Whip.

[copperrat20]

dmontzsta if you have a lot of sex your penis turns blue. If you do not have a lot of sex your balls turn blue. You will understand this once you get a promotion at Burger King and move out of your Mom's house.
:jawdrop: I like him. He can stay! :D :D :D

[bear down]

dmontzsta if you have a lot of sex your penis turns blue. If you do not have a lot of sex your balls turn blue. You will understand this once you get a promotion at Burger King and move out of your Mom's house.
ROFL...!!!

[God]

I have approved the promotion once you learn to get the fries right. I shall reveal McDonalds secret ingredient unto you. This will assure you a night assistant manager position and possibly a new funny hat.
The secret ingredient is....
salt.

[That Guy]

God, why do domestic beers have screw tops and imports need an opener? You can see I have my priorities straight... :D

[nodigg]

i thought that happened because you THOUGHT you were going to have sex but didnt. :confused:
DITTO!
Now take that gosh darn Liberal button down! :argue:

[HM]

God, will my pyramid scam put me in jail, or will I continue down the path of setting people free of their financial worries?

[God]

It is hard for Americans to open bottles when driving. I did not want them to have a wreck. I created corks so that the French might have an object to fill their forgetful canard creating mouths. I was low on gerbils. I do not like the French. Even Mary had a shave from time to time.

[That Guy]

Thank you god and I hate the French too.... :yuk:

[God]

Holy Moly, I have a silver ingot program you need to look at. If you could just get ten friends to buy in....
Avon beat the system. Say amen.

[1Bahnerjet]

Damn God you do have all the Answers.
so how come my Boat has Orange in it when I really want all solid Black ?

[God]

Black boats are bigger. By about six inches. Enjoy the orange. It's all in how you drive it.

[Keithb87]

Black boats are bigger. By about six inches. Enjoy the orange. It's all in how you drive it.
LMAO :jawdrop: :jawdrop: :D :D

[1Bahnerjet]

Black boats are bigger. By about six inches. Enjoy the orange. It's all in how you drive it.
I don't know about that.
my orange boat is "Italian"

[God]

Never doubt me. Your boat is not Italian for Zero Mostel would have put prima vera sauce on it and had it for lunch. He is my angel in charge of boating facts. I chose him for bouyancy.

[hoolign]

why do passenger mirrors have "objects are closer than they appear"on them, and the drivers side does not?

[91nordic29]

DITTO!
Now take that gosh darn Liberal button down! :argue:
nope :)

[Tom Brown]

Hi God. Please say hello to Buddha for me. :cool:

[God]

Buddha is at the Betty Ford Clinic, I tried to get him to room with Dr Adkins and James Fixx. I hope that's not bad kharma?
Passenger mirrors were originally designed to wear on the tip of your shoe. I do not know what went wrong?

[phuggit]

God, why don't you post on RRL? Did the satan worshippers (RD) ban you from their site?

[God]

I do not speak in terms of initials. Latin screwed me up up. Please be more specific.

[1Bahnerjet]

Never doubt me. Your boat is not Italian for Zero Mostel would have put prima vera sauce on it and had it for lunch. He is my angel in charge of boating facts. I chose him for bouyancy.
Actualy it is, Sicilian Italian. God would know this...

[The Devil]

Oh omnipotuous one. Funny I should find you down here!!
You guys have no idea, but he is down here because he got butt hurt up in heaven. Everyone is tire of his "all knowing" attitude and dry humor - it gets old quick. Once you get to heaven, you get to see what is behind the curtain. Elvis is really running the show these days anyways.
I know what you are thinking - what would The Devil know about heaven? Well, I am still his favorite, and for the same reasons a beaten wife goes back to be beaten time and time again, God has a weakness for me. So, I get to spend quite a bit of time raiding his fridge, taking money out of his wallet and so on. He kicks me out everyonce in a while, but then a couple days later......"Hey B, I miss ya." Let you in on a little dirt on God....he hates to be alone.
Hey G, when you get back home, I expecting lunch to be ready - and don't make a scene.

[Paul B.]

Would you gentlemen mind cutting this shit out? It's very offensive.
Peace to all of mankind - Paul

[Toomstone]

Oh omnipotuous one. Funny I should find you down here!!
You guys have no idea, but he is down here because he got butt hurt up in heaven. Everyone is tire of his "all knowing" attitude and dry humor - it gets old quick. Once you get to heaven, you get to see what is behind the curtain. Elvis is really running the show these days anyways.
I know what you are thinking - what would The Devil know about heaven? Well, I am still his favorite, and for the same reasons a beaten wife goes back to be beaten time and time again, God has a weakness for me. So, I get to spend quite a bit of time raiding his fridge, taking money out of his wallet and so on. He kicks me out everyonce in a while, but then a couple days later......"Hey B, I miss ya." Let you in on a little dirt on God....he hates to be alone.
Hey G, when you get back home, I expecting lunch to be ready - and don't make a scene.
:idea: :jawdrop: :idea:

[HOOTER SLED-]

Hey G, when you get back home, I expecting lunch to be ready - and don't make a scene.[/QUOTE]
Go ahead, bitch slap him Diablo!!!!
:D :D
Sorry Dog, I mean God. :D

[Tom Brown]

Sorry Dog, I mean God. :D
sorry dog as God? Interesting...

[Boozer]

This thread sucks you all need to give it a sucky star rating.

[Debbolas]

Oh omnipotuous one. Funny I should find you down here!!
You guys have no idea, but he is down here because he got butt hurt up in heaven. Everyone is tire of his "all knowing" attitude and dry humor - it gets old quick. Once you get to heaven, you get to see what is behind the curtain. Elvis is really running the show these days anyways.
I know what you are thinking - what would The Devil know about heaven? Well, I am still his favorite, and for the same reasons a beaten wife goes back to be beaten time and time again, God has a weakness for me. So, I get to spend quite a bit of time raiding his fridge, taking money out of his wallet and so on. He kicks me out everyonce in a while, but then a couple days later......"Hey B, I miss ya." Let you in on a little dirt on God....he hates to be alone.
Hey G, when you get back home, I expecting lunch to be ready - and don't make a scene.
So we have the devil...........
I do not speak in terms of initials. Latin screwed me up up. Please be more specific.
and we have God................
Would you gentlemen mind cutting this shit out? It's very offensive.
and we have Paul................
Now we just need Peter and Mary and John
:boxed:

[topless]

Why do we need Peter Paul and Mary when we have Tom Brown? :wink:

[Debbolas]

Why do we need Peter Paul and Mary when we have Tom Brown? :wink:
Excellent point, Topless! ;) :D (lol, can Tom sing?)

[topless]

Excellent point, Topless! ;) :D (lol, can Tom sing?)
He does his best. :cool:

[The Devil]

Tom Brown is God's favorite human. I am hoping he will live forever...I have cut him a deal that does not require him to sell his soul. Because Tom Brown in heaven is the only thing that could get me kicked out. :devil:

[FREIND OF AA AND TA]

3DO has been bugging me to ask you why the pills to make his dick bigger aren't working. He is a little shy.

[God]

Baby Jeezus!!!
I told you not to play on my computer anymore. Now get your ass to bed and I better not catch you watching the Playboy channel!!!

[God]

Sorry everybody. He's been almost intolerable ever since he got Nintendo.

[MsDrmr]

I like the color but it's a little hard on the eyes

[God]

Do not put it on your eyes. Just read it.
Amen.

[topless]

Do not put it on your eyes. Just read it.
Amen.
You are sooooooo wise! :D

[Debbolas]

God spelled backwards is Dog
and Tom spelled backwards is Mot (which is short for Mullet)
Are you begining to see the pattern? :idea:

[Lake Pirate]

Hey God ~ will the Lennon Sisters make a come back and if they do will Ed Sullivan Jr get his own show? I'll pay you the money I owe you, if you'll cut me in on one those lottery deals.

[AleAlchemist]

Dear Debbolas,
I believe you are mistaken. Peter is all over these forums! :D

[Debbolas]

Dear Debbolas,
I believe you are mistaken. Peter is all over these forums! :D
Please forgive me..............you are correct...........There is peter here by the truckload! ;)

[AleAlchemist]

Dear God,
Is a beer bong considered contraband?
and if gay people only have sex with each other, than why are there still so many? :sqsmile:

[HCS]

God. Click this shit.
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/swearingjesus.html