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Aqua Boogie1
01-25-2005, 12:18 PM
Written by a guy. After years of experience...
1. Watever u do, don't just show up at their house... they run around in their underwear just like we do.
2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they will find out and you will be mud.
3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your butt at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the hat.
4. NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.
5. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.
6. If they slap you hard, you DESERVED it.
7. DON'T be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.
8. If you DON'T sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.
8.5 If you DO sleep with them, DON'T tell your friends that you did.
9. You CAN be dirty minded in private, really... most of them are not offended by it.
10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.
11. Most of them DON'T mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a prick. (hahaha!!!)
11.5. Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!
12. Every girl should eventually get THREE THINGS from her ...boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty piece of JEWLERY. Even if it's not a serious relationship.
13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.
14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to kick the crap out of him.
15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.
16. NEVER , ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.
17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. she DOESN'T care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.
18. You're dead meat if you CAN'T get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be PRINCE CHARMING to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.
19. DON'T flirt with their moms... that's just freaky.
20. DON'T be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be UNDERSTANDING.
21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.
22. If you're officially ...dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better introduce her as your girlfriend.
23. DON'T stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.
24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.
25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very GENTLE
26. Memorize their freakin birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.
27. DON'T marinade the cologne, but smell good.
28. DON'T give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. ...Jewelry is always nice.
29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.
30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.

FMluvswater
01-25-2005, 12:25 PM
Wow. :cool:

Tom Brown
01-25-2005, 12:26 PM
Wow. :cool:
Well said, FM. I'm still laughing at the severity of that list. :D

Her454
01-25-2005, 12:28 PM
I second that! WOW. Who is this and where can I find him? :D :D

Aqua Boogie1
01-25-2005, 12:30 PM
I second that! WOW. Who is this and where can I find him? :D :D
I guess you wouldn't believe its me???????? :wink: :p

Her454
01-25-2005, 12:31 PM
I guess you wouldn't believe its me???????? :wink: :p
Ummm wasnt it you who was looking for a new doghouse awhile back? Something about a christmas party? ...... :) :rolleyes: :)

Aqua Boogie1
01-25-2005, 12:33 PM
Ummm wasnt it you who was looking for a new doghouse awhile back? Something about a christmas party? ...... :) :rolleyes: :)
LMAO!!!!!!!!!! Yeah I guess it wouldn't be me sometime!!!!!!!! :yuk: :D :D

Her454
01-25-2005, 12:35 PM
Nice try tho...............................
Hey Forensic, great minds think alike. :D

Unforgiven
01-25-2005, 01:14 PM
I second that! WOW. Who is this and where can I find him? :D :D
Ok take I-5 south to 41 head west...get to 101 go south.....end up in Arroyo Grande , take Grand ave east to Corbett canyon Rd...Oak Hill Rd turn right. you'll be right at the gates of the ranch and there you'll find me...from there it's to an Italian Resturant by the sea...after dinner, nice walk on the beach drinking from ice cold gallon of cold milk....you pick the day! :D

Tahiti350
01-25-2005, 01:42 PM
The Mrs. agreed heartily with all of them, and wants to print it and put it up in the garage where I am sure to see it regularly....... :hammerhea
Thanks a lot Auqa Boogie1

Trigger
01-25-2005, 01:52 PM
Can I sue for not posting your source? (me) :D

Her454
01-25-2005, 01:57 PM
Ok take I-5 south to 41 head west...get to 101 go south.....end up in Arroyo Grande , take Grand ave east to Corbett canyon Rd...Oak Hill Rd turn right. you'll be right at the gates of the ranch and there you'll find me...from there it's to an Italian Resturant by the sea...after dinner, nice walk on the beach drinking from ice cold gallon of cold milk....you pick the day! :D
I'll expect a signed, copywrited & sealed copy of this at dinner and expect to see a copy in your garage. ;)

Mrs. HOOTER SLED
01-25-2005, 01:59 PM
The Mrs. agreed heartily with all of them, and wants to print it and put it up in the garage where I am sure to see it regularly....... :hammerhea
Thanks a lot Auqa Boogie1
Tell your Mrs. that is a great idea!!!! I think I'll do the same!!!! :D :D

Aqua Boogie1
01-25-2005, 02:17 PM
HHHhhmmmm.......................This was a great post but I think its starting to back fire on me???? :rolleyes: :D

Kahuna
01-25-2005, 02:19 PM
How about what most guys really think!!!
1. Whatever you do show up at their house... THEY RUN AROUND IN THEIR UNDERWEAR!!!!
2. Beware of every single guy friends she has, any of them WOULD POUND HER ASS AT THE DROP OF A HAT, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the hat.
3. NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful BECAUSE YOU MIGHT GET SOME!!
4. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's BECAUSE THEY WANT SOME!!
5. If they slap you hard, its time to DROP THEM OFF AT THE CORNER!!
6. If you DON'T sleep with them, ask YOUR FRIENDS IF THEY KNOW ANYONE THAT WILL!!
7 If you DO sleep with them, tell YOUR FRIENDS THAT YOU DID!!
8. You CAN be dirty minded in private; really... most of them are not offended by it. THERE ALWAYS TIME FOR THE SHOCKER!!!
10. Most of them DON'T mind paying half of everything, BECAUSE THEY WILL GET THE OTHER HALF LATER!!
11. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door BECAUSE YOU MIGHT GET SOME!! If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely and ASK FOR A BOOTY CALL!!
12. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer AND ASK FOR A THREESOME!!
13. You're dead meat if you CAN'T get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be PRINCE CHARMING to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals. DON’T BE GAY!!
14. DON'T flirt with their moms... UNLESS THERE REALLY HOT!!
15. DON'T be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be UNDERSTANDING and STAY OUT OF SIGHT AND EAR SHOT!!
16. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked YOU MIGHT GET SOME!!
17. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very GENTLE. ONE FINGER AT A TIME!!
18. DON'T give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's Day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. ...Jewelry is always nice. AND GIVE THE RECEIPT SO THEY CAN RETURN IT!!
19. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. GET A NEW WOMAN ON THE SIDE SO YOU WON’T BE LEFT HOLDING YOUR OWN!!
:D :D :D

Her454
01-25-2005, 02:28 PM
ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SHAME ON YOU KAHUNA! :D :D :D

Mrs.Racer277
01-25-2005, 02:40 PM
Great Post. :D

callbob4homes
01-25-2005, 02:46 PM
How about what most guys really think!!!
1. Whatever you do show up at their house... THEY RUN AROUND IN THEIR UNDERWEAR!!!!
2. Beware of every single guy friends she has, any of them WOULD POUND HER ASS AT THE DROP OF A HAT, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the hat.
3. NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful BECAUSE YOU MIGHT GET SOME!!
4. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's BECAUSE THEY WANT SOME!!
5. If they slap you hard, its time to DROP THEM OFF AT THE CORNER!!
6. If you DON'T sleep with them, ask YOUR FRIENDS IF THEY KNOW ANYONE THAT WILL!!
7 If you DO sleep with them, tell YOUR FRIENDS THAT YOU DID!!
8. You CAN be dirty minded in private; really... most of them are not offended by it. THERE ALWAYS TIME FOR THE SHOCKER!!!
10. Most of them DON'T mind paying half of everything, BECAUSE THEY WILL GET THE OTHER HALF LATER!!
11. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door BECAUSE YOU MIGHT GET SOME!! If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely and ASK FOR A BOOTY CALL!!
12. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer AND ASK FOR A THREESOME!!
13. You're dead meat if you CAN'T get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be PRINCE CHARMING to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals. DON’T BE GAY!!
14. DON'T flirt with their moms... UNLESS THERE REALLY HOT!!
15. DON'T be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be UNDERSTANDING and STAY OUT OF SIGHT AND EAR SHOT!!
16. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked YOU MIGHT GET SOME!!
17. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very GENTLE. ONE FINGER AT A TIME!!
18. DON'T give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's Day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. ...Jewelry is always nice. AND GIVE THE RECEIPT SO THEY CAN RETURN IT!!
19. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. GET A NEW WOMAN ON THE SIDE SO YOU WON’T BE LEFT HOLDING YOUR OWN!!
:D :D :D
This is the way it REALLY should be. not the way it is, but..........

Unforgiven
01-25-2005, 02:51 PM
I'll expect a signed, copywrited & sealed copy of this at dinner and expect to see a copy in your garage. ;)
I take this as a yes :rollside: ....by the way I still don't smoke cigs.. :) ...

Her454
01-25-2005, 02:52 PM
I take this as a yes :rollside: ....by the way I still don't smoke cigs.. :) ...
Yes, since you offered me Milk with dinner. :)

Ms. AquaBoogie1
01-25-2005, 02:59 PM
Tell your Mrs. that is a great idea!!!! I think I'll do the same!!!! :D :D
I second that!!!!!!! :rolleyes: :D

Unforgiven
01-25-2005, 03:22 PM
Yes, since you offered me Milk with dinner. :)
I think your saying YES because you need the new drive and MSD ignition to go with the blower :cool: oh well it's all yours...you want fuel injection or the carbs with that deal??

Her454
01-25-2005, 03:25 PM
I think your saying YES because you need the new drive and MSD ignition to go with the blower :cool: oh well it's all yours...you want fuel injection or the carbs with that deal??
....................does it matter WHY I said yes................... :D

Desert Rat
01-25-2005, 03:50 PM
I like Kahuna's better. Sorry Doug but yours is just a little to whipped for me...P.S. don't tell the wife i said that!!

Aqua Boogie1
01-25-2005, 04:02 PM
Those work too!!!!!! :D

Unforgiven
01-25-2005, 04:52 PM
....................does it matter WHY I said yes................... :D
Nope...well maybe....all that matters is you said YES :D

Kim Hanson
01-25-2005, 06:20 PM
Written by a guy. After years of experience...
1. Watever u do, don't just show up at their house... they run around in their underwear just like we do.
2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they will find out and you will be mud.
3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your butt at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the hat.
4. NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.
5. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.
6. If they slap you hard, you DESERVED it.
7. DON'T be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.
8. If you DON'T sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.
8.5 If you DO sleep with them, DON'T tell your friends that you did.
9. You CAN be dirty minded in private, really... most of them are not offended by it.
10. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.
11. Most of them DON'T mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a prick. (hahaha!!!)
11.5. Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!
12. Every girl should eventually get THREE THINGS from her ...boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty piece of JEWLERY. Even if it's not a serious relationship.
13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.
14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to kick the crap out of him.
15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.
16. NEVER , ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.
17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. she DOESN'T care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.
18. You're dead meat if you CAN'T get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be PRINCE CHARMING to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.
19. DON'T flirt with their moms... that's just freaky.
20. DON'T be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be UNDERSTANDING.
21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.
22. If you're officially ...dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better introduce her as your girlfriend.
23. DON'T stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.
24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.
25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very GENTLE
26. Memorize their freakin birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.
27. DON'T marinade the cologne, but smell good.
28. DON'T give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful. ...Jewelry is always nice.
29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.
30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.
Im pretty much the same, but never let a girl flirt with you when the wife is in the room and this girl doesn't know you are married........( . )( . ).....
Never ever leave in the middle of the night, that don't fly toooo far... :D
Fix that car of hers when ever its broken, or at least look at it.....I lived with 5 girls at one time and don't fix anything of theirs thats broken, thats not cool at all.
Rose's are a mans best friend at time, with gems :D