So after donating some money I have a complaint

[R.A.D.man]

So after donating some money I have a complaint but cannot bring myself to speak out. A best friends inlaws have a 1 year old with a condition for which he will need therapy to have a chance so I wanted to pitch in. Simply put, he is not developing mentally and physically and physical therapy along with the parents learning what to do so that they can administer the therapy can help. The 1 year old is their fifth child, the previous two were twins, and I just learned another is now on the way. This family undoubtedly is financially poor. 3 years ago when the husband lost his job, they learned they were better off if he did not work due to welfare, etc. The mother does not work. They are IMO, a little off the deep end with their religious beliefs and feel that if a child is to be conceived, it is meant to be, birth control is not in their vocabulary. Is it just me, or are these guys kookoo for coocoo puffs. How can your childrens best interest be your priority when each additional child (and I bellieve they will continue to have more) lessens your ability to care for the others? My donation, albeit right for the child, only makes me think I am contributing to this familys welfare state. Any thoughts?

[Forkin' Crazy]

Wow.... seems to be more prevalent these days.
Just think of if they were acting like that 100 years ago.
The Dem's welfare/give away programs have created people like this.... Sad....
She should have an implant in her arm making her effectively sterile. As should any woman on assisted anything. Ignorance should not be allowed to breed.
We have a big mess to clean up.
BTW I can't say your wrong or right for your contribution, but it seems your heart is in the right place. And that's more than I can say for the parents.

[flat broke]

I agree 100% on the path of reversible sterilization for females on any type of government assistance. If you can't afford what you have, you have no business increasing your potential for debt.
Since you mentioned that ignroance shouldn't be allowed to breed,(I agree in concept, except the part about violating civil rights as dumb people have em too), maybe you've heard of some of the the government sponsored/forced labotomies that happend in the 50s and 60s. I saw a deal on dateline or 20/20 some time ago about how back in the day, the government would just take stupid people, pump insulin up to the frontal lobe, and then institutionalize these people. It's something that I'd have to do some research on to get more specifics, but it scares the hell out of me, thinking it could have happened. I'm all for the government helping out with common sense items like mandatory birth control for welfare recipeients, but if you give em a little power, before you know it, you can be wishing you hadn't... Freedom/Equality/Order. You can have all 3, but not in equal measure. ;)
Chris

[R.A.D.man]

HMMM, mandatory birth control, that would do it. Never even thought of that. I'd have to agree that if you receive government assistance it could be a good thing but I doubt we will ever see it. Maybe a voluntary program could one day be funded. That would have to be cheaper that footing the bill for more children. I'll keep that one in my pocket for a good topic to discuss if the right situation arises.
On a side note, before I was made aware of the upcoming child, I discussed this with my Dad and he committed a contribution as well. The needy family knows this but is unaware of how much. My Dad is now aware of the whole story and will place the money in my hands this weekend to "do with as I see fit." What would you do? Give them all of it or just a partial amount? Dad wouldn't blink an eye if I gave them nothing.

[058]

Don't give them cash. If you still feel charitable buy them something they can use and not something that would be considered a luxury item like a TV.....hummmm...maybe a TV for their bedroom might not be a bad idea, it might keep them from making more kids. Or you could buy them condoms.

[Forkin' Crazy]

That's it! A case of condoms!!! LOL!
I know where you are coming from FB. And you are right. It would never work right. But if on gov. assistance it would work.....
I remember hearing some big ole fat black welfare woman on TV saying, "I cans haves has many chillins' as I want. It's my right!!!"
Fine have as many as you want, but PAY YOUR OWN WAY!!!! :220v:

[sanger rat]

Give them a choice. Birth control and walfare or no birth control no walfare.

[R.A.D.man]

Thanks guys. I really wanted to write "for condoms" in the memo line on my check when I mailed it in. They do have a fund set up to help pay for the special therapy center needed. The sister managing the account is straight up whne she says this fund is for the childs expenses only and she will not give them the cash, she only pays their medical bills with it when they come in. I am thinking of matching my donation with my fathers and using the remaining balance, which I know there will be, for something else. He will not take back the difference.

[mickeyfinn]

My Dad is now aware of the whole story and will place the money in my hands this weekend to "do with as I see fit." What would you do? Give them all of it or just a partial amount? Dad wouldn't blink an eye if I gave them nothing.
Use the money for a new boat. Unfortunately whatever you do for these folks is just going to make them realize how much better off they are by not working. Whatever you do is probably not going to make a realistic difference to them. Might as well enjoy it yourself. :idea:

[R.A.D.man]

Final update,
My dad decided that they "need to get their priorities straight", no money changed hands and I was happy to be the bearer of the news to those collecting the money. I will not so freely promise to donate ever again. I did what I said I originally would but after hearing of the upcoming 6th child, I will never forget it. I hope the child in need receives the best of care, but I know that is impossible based on the attitude of his parents. It pisses me off every time I think about it.