My girlfriend's dog is an asshole

[sorry dog]

Unfortunately he is also smart for a dog (13 year old rott/lab mix). He can open gates, doors, and garbage lids. Also is very good at not getting directly caught sleeping in my bed and on leather couch. I figger it out later from the filth and rips in the sheets his claws make when he is chewing on his asshole.
I'd kick him outside, but he's even better at causing problems out there. He once ripped her dad's satellite dish off the house in protest of not being let in. I once hooked up some wire and a small cattle charger on top of the bed on got him good a couple of times but apparently he's figgered out when that's not around.
Not sure what to do now except up the voltage.

[dmontzsta]

lol sounds like a movie.

[Tom Brown]

I recommend a gasoline enema.

[Rexone]

I figger it out later from the filth and rips in the sheets his claws make when he is chewing on his asshole. I once hooked up some wire and a small cattle charger on top of the bed on got him good a couple of times but apparently he's figgered out when that's not around.
Sounds like a real comfortable place you got there SD. :squiggle:

[sorry dog]

He also bitten me a few times... but I can't get too mad since I hit him first.
He knows how to get in through a locked door... takes a 60 minutes for him to eat his way through.
Definately reminds me of Turner and Hooch sometimes.

[sorry dog]

Sounds like a real comfortable place you got there SD. :squiggle:
It's actually much better since I kicked the cat outside...but I'll save that rant for another night.

[Tom Brown]

Not sure what to do now except up the voltage.
Why not lock him in that burnt out Fargo pickup that's blocking the front steps?

[sorry dog]

I like the pickup.
Oh. Forgot to mention another talent the dog has...
He can emit some of the most potent stinkers known to man. I swear that you can actually see them. The toxicity levels definately require you to leave the room for a while.

[slingingsmoke]

Nice. Blame it on the dog......LOL

[sorry dog]

I wish a could fart that good.
You could probably run a lawnmower engine if you ran a tube from the carb to the dog's ass.

[Tom Brown]

My brother used to have a dog that could fill a room with brown mist. The vet said it was a problem with her diet. He tried everything but nothing seemed to help.
He ended up giving the dog away. I recall him saying something about the dog being better off in a farm environment. :D

[Rexone]

I like the pickup.
Oh. Forgot to mention another talent the dog has...
He can emit some of the most potent stinkers known to man. I swear that you can actually see them. The toxicity levels definately require you to leave the room for a while.
If you stop feeding him the possum table scraps I think you might find the gas would less troublesome or frequent.

[a catered life]

lol sounds like a movie.
lol dont worry until you see the dam dog with a screenname posting crap about you :cry:

[lucky]

i think you should move him in wth her 87 yo grand ma :idea:

[CandyA$$]

I found that if you bite the dog (yeah yourself) on the lip it gives a whole new meaning to respect for them.
I did it to my dog, but then again he is only a small dog.
But I have been told this by many vets.
Oh yeah add some garlic to the food and sometimes that calms the smell. Don't ask me how cause I have never had the problem, but read this somewhere.
Goodluck

[topless]

Remember that time we let the dog sleep in bed with us? :D

[Freak]

Get one of those big metal crates at the pet store and shove him in there at night/when your not home.

[WYRD]

My girlfriends dog is an asshole.
SORRY DOG..................thats all I have to say about that :D

[Tom Brown]

Remember that time we let the dog sleep in bed with us? :D
Remember? The dog wouldn't stop sniffing your crotch. I can't say that I blame it, though.

[lucky]

Remember? The dog wouldn't stop sniffing your crotch. I can't say that I blame it, though.
fockin tom -- i love you man lmao :D

[topless]

Remember? The dog wouldn't stop sniffing your crotch. I can't say that I blame it, though.But don't you also remember him licking yours? I recall you getting pretty excited at the time. :D

[jackpunx]

Unfortunately he is also smart for a dog (13 year old rott/lab mix). He can open gates, doors, and garbage lids. Also is very good at not getting directly caught sleeping in my bed and on leather couch. I figger it out later from the filth and rips in the sheets his claws make when he is chewing on his asshole.
I'd kick him outside, but he's even better at causing problems out there. He once ripped her dad's satellite dish off the house in protest of not being let in. I once hooked up some wire and a small cattle charger on top of the bed on got him good a couple of times but apparently he's figgered out when that's not around.
Not sure what to do now except up the voltage.
does this dog live in your house .. or do you live in your GF's dads house

[PlyaPlya22]

Feed him a couple of boxes of prunes! :D

[plaster dave]

If you stop feeding him the possum table scraps I think you might find the gas would less troublesome or frequent.
Look I have a Rot that gets no table scraps at all and can clear a room like nobuddy else I have ever seen.

[Tom Brown]

But don't you also remember him licking yours? I recall you getting pretty excited at the time. :D
To this day, I keep a jar of peanut butter in the night stand. :cool:

[PlyaPlya22]

To this day, I keep a jar of peanut butter in the night stand. :cool:
creamy or crunchy??

[Tom Brown]

creamy or crunchy??
Extra creamy.

[PlyaPlya22]

Extra creamy.
You don't like the itching huh...LOL