I Dare Boatcop

[KACHINA KEN]

To do 3 things.
1. Tell a non cop type joke.
2.share a fav cocktail recipe.
3.and tell a short story about a cute piece of river booty from when he was a young buck.
Can he do it? We will see...............

[HCS]

:notam:

[KACHINA KEN]

Ill see your :notam: and raise you a :rolleyes:

[Boatcop]

1.
A duck walks into a bar, goes to the bartender and says: "Got any gwapes?"
The bartender says, no we don't have any "gwapes" and throws the duck out.
The next day the duck walks into the same bar, goes to the bartender and asks: "Got any gwapes?"
Again, the bartender syas they don't have any "gwapes" and this time (getting angry) kicks him square in the butt out the front door.
The next day, the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any gwapes?" The bartender, now furious, grabs the duck by the neck and says: "Listen you little freak, if you come in here asking for gwapes again, I'm gonna staple you feet to the floor!" And then throws him so hard he flys out the door and across the street.
The next day the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any staples?" the bartender looks at him curiously and says: "No."
The duck responds "Got any gwapes?"
2.
I don't drink anymore, but back in the day I was fond of "Red Hots". shot of Cinnamon Schnapps with a dash of Tabasco. Tastes just like the candy.
3.
I was out here with my (then) girlfriend at my brother's house (about 1974) and my GF and I went in to take a shower after a day on the River. After being in for about 5 minutes, her sister came in and joined us. The rest of the story doesn't meet Hot Boat censorship guidelines.
Don't ever Dare me! :D

[WYRD]

1.
A duck walks into a bar, goes to the bartender and says: "Got any gwapes?"
The bartender says, no we don't have any "gwapes" and throws the duck out.
The next day the duck walks into the same bar, goes to the bartender and asks: "Got any gwapes?"
Again, the bartender syas they don't have any "gwapes" and this time (getting angry) kicks him square in the butt out the front door.
The next day, the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any gwapes?" The bartender, now furious, grabs the duck by the neck and says: "Listen you little freak, if you come in here asking for gwapes again, I'm gonna staple you feet to the floor!" And then throws him so hard he flys out the door and across the street.
The next day the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any staples?" the bartender looks at him curiously and says: "No."
The duck responds "Got any gwapes?"
2.
I don't drink anymore, but back in the day I was fond of "Red Hots". shot of Cinnamon Schnapps with a dash of Tabasco. Tastes just like the candy.
3.
I was out here with my (then) girlfriend at my brother's house (about 1974) and my GF and I went in to take a shower after a day on the River. After being in for about 5 minutes, her sister came in and joined us. The rest of the story doesn't meet Hot Boat censorship guidelines.
Don't ever Dare me! :D
Now if you combined all three of those stories we might be getting somewhere :D

[Waldo]

1.
A duck walks into a bar, goes to the bartender and says: "Got any gwapes?"
The bartender says, no we don't have any "gwapes" and throws the duck out.
The next day the duck walks into the same bar, goes to the bartender and asks: "Got any gwapes?"
Again, the bartender syas they don't have any "gwapes" and this time (getting angry) kicks him square in the butt out the front door.
The next day, the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any gwapes?" The bartender, now furious, grabs the duck by the neck and says: "Listen you little freak, if you come in here asking for gwapes again, I'm gonna staple you feet to the floor!" And then throws him so hard he flys out the door and across the street.
The next day the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any staples?" the bartender looks at him curiously and says: "No."
The duck responds "Got any gwapes?"
2.
I don't drink anymore, but back in the day I was fond of "Red Hots". shot of Cinnamon Schnapps with a dash of Tabasco. Tastes just like the candy.
3.
I was out here with my (then) girlfriend at my brother's house (about 1974) and my GF and I went in to take a shower after a day on the River. After being in for about 5 minutes, her sister came in and joined us. The rest of the story doesn't meet Hot Boat censorship guidelines.
Don't ever Dare me! :D
Nicely Done!!!

[BarryMac]

Great Joke, Good Drinks and the last story, well I'm callin BS on it... :D

[WYRD]

even the jet skis seemed a little more cautious and courteous.
you are not coverting are you Bob :hammerhea :crossx:

[JackieV]

1.
A duck walks into a bar, goes to the bartender and says: "Got any gwapes?"
The bartender says, no we don't have any "gwapes" and throws the duck out.
The next day the duck walks into the same bar, goes to the bartender and asks: "Got any gwapes?"
Again, the bartender syas they don't have any "gwapes" and this time (getting angry) kicks him square in the butt out the front door.
The next day, the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any gwapes?" The bartender, now furious, grabs the duck by the neck and says: "Listen you little freak, if you come in here asking for gwapes again, I'm gonna staple you feet to the floor!" And then throws him so hard he flys out the door and across the street.
The next day the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any staples?" the bartender looks at him curiously and says: "No."
The duck responds "Got any gwapes?"
2.
I don't drink anymore, but back in the day I was fond of "Red Hots". shot of Cinnamon Schnapps with a dash of Tabasco. Tastes just like the candy.
3.
I was out here with my (then) girlfriend at my brother's house (about 1974) and my GF and I went in to take a shower after a day on the River. After being in for about 5 minutes, her sister came in and joined us. The rest of the story doesn't meet Hot Boat censorship guidelines.
Don't ever Dare me! :D
Ya see guys, Boatcop isn't such a square :boxed: after all.

[Nord]

:D :D Great meeting you this weekend!! Did you buy that boat yet????
Check out RRL. There is a thread asking you a question!

[hoolign]

1.
A duck walks into a bar, goes to the bartender and says: "Got any gwapes?"
The bartender says, no we don't have any "gwapes" and throws the duck out.
The next day the duck walks into the same bar, goes to the bartender and asks: "Got any gwapes?"
Again, the bartender syas they don't have any "gwapes" and this time (getting angry) kicks him square in the butt out the front door.
The next day, the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any gwapes?" The bartender, now furious, grabs the duck by the neck and says: "Listen you little freak, if you come in here asking for gwapes again, I'm gonna staple you feet to the floor!" And then throws him so hard he flys out the door and across the street.
The next day the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any staples?" the bartender looks at him curiously and says: "No."
The duck responds "Got any gwapes?"
2.
I don't drink anymore, but back in the day I was fond of "Red Hots". shot of Cinnamon Schnapps with a dash of Tabasco. Tastes just like the candy.
3.
I was out here with my (then) girlfriend at my brother's house (about 1974) and my GF and I went in to take a shower after a day on the River. After being in for about 5 minutes, her sister came in and joined us. The rest of the story doesn't meet Hot Boat censorship guidelines.
Don't ever Dare me! :D
Don't try tellin me that you guys stood in the shower saying f uck? :p

[Boatcop]

:D :D Great meeting you this weekend!! Did you buy that boat yet????
Nice seeing you guys out there, too. I was going to stop by the dump Dave calls home-away-from-home, but got a little too busy on the water.
Talked to the owner this morning to make sure he didn't sell it out from under me. (He just got back from an Alaska cruise)
We're gonna go out tomorrow or Thursday and shake it down. If it runs all right, it'll be in the driveway by Friday...... :)
........and on the River Sunday. :D
(Saturday I gotta work the tube float)

[RiverDave]

Nice seeing you guys out there, too. I was going to stop by the dump Dave calls home-away-from-home, but got a little too busy on the water.
Talked to the owner this morning to make sure he didn't sell it out from under me. (He just got back from an Alaska cruise)
We're gonna go out tomorrow or Thursday and shake it down. If it runs all right, it'll be in the driveway by Friday...... :)
........and on the River Sunday. :D
(Saturday I gotta work the tube float)
The "Dump?" LOL... U gotta be kidding me.. I've heard it called the dentist office before becuase of my awnings and the round window etc.. but a dump? I think not.
RD <--- still has iced teas in the fridge for you.

[Boatcop]

I only call it a dump because of all the River "trash" you have laying around it every weekend. :D
Place looks like a morgue at about 7 AM Sunday mornings. Bodies laying everywhere, and the only one's moving are zombies.

[KACHINA KEN]

1.
A duck walks into a bar, goes to the bartender and says: "Got any gwapes?"
The bartender says, no we don't have any "gwapes" and throws the duck out.
The next day the duck walks into the same bar, goes to the bartender and asks: "Got any gwapes?"
Again, the bartender syas they don't have any "gwapes" and this time (getting angry) kicks him square in the butt out the front door.
The next day, the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any gwapes?" The bartender, now furious, grabs the duck by the neck and says: "Listen you little freak, if you come in here asking for gwapes again, I'm gonna staple you feet to the floor!" And then throws him so hard he flys out the door and across the street.
The next day the duck walks into the bar and asks: "Got any staples?" the bartender looks at him curiously and says: "No."
The duck responds "Got any gwapes?"
2.
I don't drink anymore, but back in the day I was fond of "Red Hots". shot of Cinnamon Schnapps with a dash of Tabasco. Tastes just like the candy.
3.
I was out here with my (then) girlfriend at my brother's house (about 1974) and my GF and I went in to take a shower after a day on the River. After being in for about 5 minutes, her sister came in and joined us. The rest of the story doesn't meet Hot Boat censorship guidelines.
Don't ever Dare me! :D
Thanks Alan,
And for those of you who didn't quite get why I even posted this my explanation is this. For a majority of us this is a little moment of escape and sometimes people with jobs that others may be curious of come on here and then instead of them getting their fair share of escapeism it winds up being more of the same for them. I'm glad I don't have a job like Alan where the only time people post me a question it's job related, it would make me want to leave this place. So my challenge to the rest of you is to get to know your neighbor a little better than you may now, you may find out you like them for more reasons than you originally thought you did. :D
Schools over,
Run along and play now.
Your fellow boater
Kachina Ken

[Tom Brown]

Alan really handled this thread. :cool:
Hey Alan, I dare you to eat two bananas, 500 ml of yogurt, and then jog three miles.

[Nord]

I met Alan on Saturday up by the dam. Really nice guy!

[hoolign]

Thanks Alan,
And for those of you who didn't quite get why I even posted this my explanation is this. For a majority of us this is a little moment of escape and sometimes people with jobs that others may be curious of come on here and then instead of them getting their fair share of escapeism it winds up being more of the same for them. I'm glad I don't have a job like Alan where the only time people post me a question it's job related, it would make me want to leave this place. So my challenge to the rest of you is to get to know your neighbor a little better than you may now, you may find out you like them for more reasons than you originally thought you did. :D
Schools over,
Run along and play now.
Your fellow boater
Kachina Ken
Actually Ken
Alan has been on here longer than you have and most of us who have been on here for a long time know Alan has a great sense of humour...but I agree on the getting to know your neighbor comment...unfortunately I aint allowed in the USA..so best I'll eever do is meet you peeps on here!..unlesss....Alan ...care to make a few bucks calling in a favor at customs :D

[Tom Brown]

I think I'm going to move to the US. :idea:

[hoolign]

I think I'm going to move to the US. :idea:
I can still have your IP addy tracked!...you aint gettin away from me that easy ....Bitch :D :rolleyes:

[ColeTR1]

1. funny :D
2. sounds good I'm going to try that! :eat:
3. below is Awesome :D
her sister came in and joined us.

[STV_Keith]

Place looks like a morgue at about 7 AM Sunday mornings. Bodies laying everywhere, and the only one's moving are zombies.
Sun Up = Signal to go to bed at RD's. :rollside:

[wsuwrhr]

Gonna have to try harder bud. Looks like he bested you.
To do 3 things.
1. Pretty funny....got any staples? Good....got an gwapes?
2. HOT
3. :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:
Brian

[RiverDave]

Am I the only one that didn't get the "gwapes" joke?
RD

[HM]

Am I the only one that didn't get the "gwapes" joke?
RD
LOL...Probably.
Hey, got any staples?
O.K....
Got any Misters left?

[RiverDave]

LOL...Probably.
Hey, got any staples?
O.K....
Got any Misters left?
You know I do... LOL How many you need?
RD <--- must be dumb as a post.. becuase I'm not getting the gwapes?

[PowellScooter]

but what did her sister do with the grapes and the duck :cool:

[Waldo]

Am I the only one that didn't get the "gwapes" joke?
RD
I get the first part of the punchline...The duck was being a smarta$$ by NOT asking for grapes at first when he came into the bar for the last time but asking for staples instead...hence the "no" from the bartender.
However, the additional asking for gwapes threw me for a loop that I still am riding :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused:

[prosthogod]

So Ken, what's your joke, drink and story? :D

[Biglue]

I get the first part of the punchline...The duck was being a smarta$$ by NOT asking for grapes at first when he came into the bar for the last time but asking for staples instead...hence the "no" from the bartender.
However, the additional asking for gwapes threw me for a loop that I still am riding :confused: :confused: :confused: :confused:
Dude you're kidding right? I bet you really do have a shirt like the one in your sig line. :D :D :D :hammer2:

[wsuwrhr]

Am I the only one that didn't get the "gwapes" joke?
RD
Can't staple to duck to the floor like he promised.
"Got any gwapes?"
Brian