Hump Day Humor!

[OGShocker]

An Arab-American family was considering putting their grandfather in a nursing home.
All the Muslim facilities were completely full, so they ended up putting him in a Jewish home.
After a few weeks in the Jewish facility, they come to visit grandpa.
"How do you like it here?" asks the grandson
"It's wonderful! Everyone here is so courteous and respectful," says grandpa.
We're so happy for you. We were worried that this was the wrong place for you."
"Let me tell you about how wonderfully they treat the residents here,"
grandpa says with a big smile.
"There's a musician here -- he's 85-years old. He hasn't played the violin in 20 years and everyone still calls him 'Maestro'!
And there's a physician here -- 90 years old. He hasn't been practicing medicine for 25 years and everyone still calls him 'Doctor'!
And me, I haven't had sex for 30 years and they still call me "The F*cking Arab!"
.
.
.
Have a great day! :D

[MsDrmr]

cute, didn't see that one comin :D

[Throttle]

a good start to a day off today, thanks. :D

[HCS]

Nice. :D
I woke up this morning thinking it was Friday. Gave me an attitude when I realized it wasn't. :rolleyes:
I could use the laugh.

[soupersonic]

Tom walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. He sat
down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10:00 news
was on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large
building preparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Tom and said, "Do you think he'll jump?" Tom says,
"You know, I bet he'll jump.
The blond replied, "Well, I bet he won't."
Tom placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, plummeting to his death.
The blond was very upset and handed her $20 to Tom, saying, "Fair's
fair. Here's your money.”
Tom replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5
o'clock news and so I knew he would jump."
HERE COMES THE BLONDE PART!!
The blond replies, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Tom took the money.

[OGShocker]

Tom walked into a sports bar around 9:58 PM. He sat
down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV. The 10:00 news
was on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large
building preparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Tom and said, "Do you think he'll jump?" Tom says,
"You know, I bet he'll jump.
The blond replied, "Well, I bet he won't."
Tom placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy on the ledge did a swan dive off the building, plummeting to his death.
The blond was very upset and handed her $20 to Tom, saying, "Fair's
fair. Here's your money.”
Tom replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5
o'clock news and so I knew he would jump."
HERE COMES THE BLONDE PART!!
The blond replies, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Tom took the money.
:D :D :D

[welk2party]

Lmao