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View Full Version : Sunday funny!!!



JustMVG
12-11-2005, 11:44 AM
LEGAL DIFFERENCE
A lawyer runs a stop sign and gets pulled over by a Sheriff's Deputy.
He thinks that he is smarter than the Deputy because he is sure that he
has a better education. He decides to prove this to himself and have
some fun at the deputies expense.
Deputy says, "License and registration, please."
Lawyer says, "What for?"
Deputy says, "You didn't come to a complete stop at the stop sign."
Lawyer says, "I slowed down, and no one was coming."
Deputy says, "You still didn't come to a complete stop. License and
registration, please."
Lawyer says, "What's the difference?"
Deputy says, "The difference is, you have to come to a complete stop,
that's the law. License and registration, please!"
Lawyer says, "If you can show me the legal difference between slow down
and stop, I'll give you my license and registration and you give me the
ticket, if not - you let me go and no ticket."
Deputy says, "Exit your vehicle then, sir."
At this point, the deputy takes out his nightstick and starts beating
the ever-loving sh..t out of the lawyer and says: "Do you want me to
stop or just slow down?"
VIBRATIONAL WISDOM
As a woman passes her daughter's closed bedroom door, she heard a
strange buzzing noise coming from within. Opening the door, she observed her
daughter giving herself a real workout with a vibrator. Shocked, she
asked: "What in the world are you doing?"
The daughter replied: "Mom, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and
this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go
away and leave me alone."
The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz coming from the
other side of the closed bedroom door. Upon entering the room, he observed
his daughter making passionate love to her vibrator. To his query as to
what she was doing, the daughter said: "Dad I'm thirty-five, unmarried,
and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please,
go away and leave me alone."
A couple days later, the wife came home from a shopping trip, placed
the groceries on the kitchen counter, and heard that buzzing noise coming
from, of all places, the living room. She entered that area and
observed her husband sitting on the couch, downing a cold beer, and staring at
the tv. The vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing like crazy.
The wife asked: "What the hell are you doing?"
The husband replied: "I'm watching football with my son-in-law!"

atomickitn
12-11-2005, 12:02 PM
lol! :boxed: