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View Full Version : Dumbest things you've done and survived



Cas
10-23-2006, 07:15 AM
We did this on another board and I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. Here's a couple of mine-
One weekend a dump truck was parked right across the street from our house, I'm about 8 years old. Well, we decided to check out the gas tank, now that I'm older and hopefully smarter, I have to assume it was deisel. Anyway, we decided the only way to find out if there was gas in the tank was to throw a lit match in. Holy crap! The flame that came out of that thing was amazing....a 10ft torch! Put the cap on and it went out, pretty cool. Yep, we did it a couple of more times before my friend's Dad tore us a new one.
The other one involves one of those tractors I mentioned above. Back then we found out they didn't need a key to start the engine. There was ths little switch on the dash that would power things up and a button to start the engine. As luck would have it, we found them and fired one of those puppies up. 3 - 8 year old kids driving a front loader around a huge construction site got us into a ton of trouble.
I can't even imagine what I'd do to my kids if they did half the crap I did as a kid!

riverracerx
10-23-2006, 09:00 AM
Told my wife NO outloud.

a catered life
10-23-2006, 09:04 AM
got married because the sex was awesome :cry:

Ziggy
10-23-2006, 09:05 AM
lost the front wheel of a motorcycle(borrowed) when pulling a wheelie down the street.....All I remember was waking up in my neighbors house with a bloody head.

Cheap Thrills
10-23-2006, 09:21 AM
link (http://www.***boat.com/forums/showthread.php?t=116048&highlight=dumbest+stunt)
C.T. :wink:

topless
10-23-2006, 09:24 AM
I registered at ***boat.com. (what was I thinking and why am I still alive?)

roostwear
10-23-2006, 09:25 AM
Married my first wife....

Cs19
10-23-2006, 09:31 AM
link (http://www.***boat.com/forums/showthread.php?t=116048&highlight=dumbest+stunt)
C.T. :wink:
the automatic door opener is hilarious. :)

Nord
10-23-2006, 09:33 AM
Got on a bull named Airtime because they wanted to buck him and nobody would get on him. I had ridden him twice already and figured he would be fun to get on again.
He was really nervous in the chutes and wouldn't stay still so I called my gate with him leaning on my left leg.
He blew up right in my face and started spinning inside the chute without leaving it!!!!
I stuck it to him for about 2 and a half rounds and got rocked outside of him. When I tried to make a move to get back on top of him, he turned on the gas and I hit my shoulder on the chute. This ripped me off the top of him.
Over???
No,
I hung up to him and couldn't get free. He dragged me underneath him and stepped all over me. When my rope popped free, I lifted my head and BOOM!!! He planted one of his hooves right in the middle of my face breaking my nose in 4 spots and cracking a cheak bone.
I ended up with a shoulder with all of the skin missing from it. You could see how the human shoulder worked if I showed you. I also ended up getting sinus surgery with a little rhynoplasty (sp?) as well.
It was magical...
I look back on my rodeo days and have no idea how I did it.

rrrr
10-23-2006, 09:38 AM
Made an oxyacetylene bomb with a 30 gallon trash bag.....it worked so well we decided to make another one.
The bag was just about full when a static electricty spark set it off....while we were standing all around it in a closed garage. Couldn't hear very well for a few days.... :220v: :220v:

jimslade
10-23-2006, 09:42 AM
1. Poured gas on a bonfire that I thought had gone out.(wet wood) didn't know I could run that fast.(30 years old)
2. Drove my snowmobile over a pond.(summer) The drop to the water was alot lower than I thought.(boing) (41 years old)
3. Drove my snowmobile over the same pond to the island(summer) this time on the level side. Made it to the island this time. The island was only 50 ft. long. Could't get enough speed up to get back. Sunk 10 ft from land. (42 years old)
4. Played chicken with a small speed boat. Left a large hole in the side of mine. Drove fast to shore,kept the hole above the water.Beached the boat never sunk.Many hours of repair later,sold boat.(18 years old)
5. Drove a snowmobile(fast) without a helmut.caught a buried fence and did the best superman impression ever. (19 years old)
6.Worst ever. Started to renovate a 40 year old house that was never built with any permits.NEVER EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!(I'm now tearing it down and building new)

OCMerrill
10-23-2006, 09:45 AM
Married my first wife....
I made one of those mistakes as well.

a catered life
10-23-2006, 09:50 AM
I registered at ***boat.com. (what was I thinking and why am I still alive?)
you beat me i came back in here to post this :p

deltaAce
10-23-2006, 10:01 AM
Me & a friend wanted to make a UFO. We rounded up a bunch of helium ballons from the car dealer lots & then attached a long thin wire w/ gas soaked rags hanging down 8'. We payed out a couple rolls of kite string & admired our "fire in the sky". We flew it over I-680 freeway from the park & nearly caused an accident.
We tried it again from our house & while paying it out it droped down onto a neighbors truck as he was rounding the corner home. It attached to his door mirror & he was franticly swatting at it while while weaving the road & almost crashed. We ran but the string led right to our driveway. :rollside:

Zaairman
10-23-2006, 10:06 AM
Growing up, my younger brother was always my tester, so he spent many hours in the ER, while I was at home in time out. I think I won. He lost 2 - 3 front teeth, got a screwdriver in the back of his head, and many cuts and bruises.
Most recently it was trying to start a bonfire where the wood was wet by using gasoline.
Oh, and I almost bought a Dodge.

ANXIETY ATTACK
10-23-2006, 10:15 AM
out at catalina decided to move boat to another spot, left milk crate on bow ( 300 ft rope with 20 ft 5/16 chain and 15 lb anchor ), at around 50 mph, a small section of rope touched the water and in 3 sec. pulled out all the chain going zearp and then the anchor goes ziping by my friends head at 50 mph. scared the shioot out of us.

Huckleberry
10-23-2006, 10:36 AM
Married my ex-wife! :crossx: :2purples: :hammerhea

Back Forty
10-23-2006, 10:54 AM
I was at a friends place in San Leandro. He was preparing to leave for corona and I had to get back up north out towards bodega bay. I was there with no car. He had a 61 dodge and an '94 sportster. He needed the car so I took the cycle. I had never been on a motorcycle and had no concept of counter steering... I go to the entrance ramp for the 880 and started rolling the throttle up. Wow. I still can't believe I made it. I tried to "steer" and instead of following the curve of the ramp I popped right out onto the highway. I never looked at this point. I didn't have a choice anymore. I just dug around for first, pointed it in the correct direction and gave it hell. No accidents and I was still alive. This was probably about 3-4 in the afternoon and there was plenty of traffic. I spent the next hour or so doing 70 or so white knuckled and happy to be alive but still leaning to get left or right. I made it all of the way out past petaluma without figuring out the steering thing. A friend slapped me on the back of the head the next day and gave me the run down about counter steering. I had a great labor day weekend after that doing a nice slow cruise down the coast through the twisties. I guess I learned but how Fn stupid of me. :yuk:

ratso
10-23-2006, 12:27 PM
got married because the sex was awesome :cry:
I always thought that was the only reason for getting married... :idea:

Jbb
10-23-2006, 12:28 PM
.....No comment...

desertbird
10-23-2006, 12:51 PM
Have read all 2000+ posts on the "Sunk the Boat" thread!
LOL :rolleyes:

Debbolas
10-23-2006, 01:40 PM
Me & a friend wanted to make a UFO. We rounded up a bunch of helium ballons from the car dealer lots & then attached a long thin wire w/ gas soaked rags hanging down 8'. We payed out a couple rolls of kite string & admired our "fire in the sky". We flew it over I-680 freeway from the park & nearly caused an accident.
We tried it again from our house & while paying it out it droped down onto a neighbors truck as he was rounding the corner home. It attached to his door mirror & he was franticly swatting at it while while weaving the road & almost crashed. We ran but the string led right to our driveway. :rollside:
:D funny :D
I was on the back of my friends boat, we dropped the anchor (with rope) and sat there and watched as the rope dropped into the clear water of Lake Powell...It was so clear, we could watch it go down. Didn't think about diving in until it was too late :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
Lake Powell, I leaned over the bow to look down into the clear water, you could see down about 25 feet (the lake was high back then) and watched my sunglasses go floating down, I was thinking about jumping in :rolleyes: :rolleyes:
Drove home from October fest at Big Bear like I was driving the Indy 500. (after a few beers) Thought I was doing an outstanding job of driving...I was probably SUCH an idiot...a miracle I survived.... :rolleyes:
all I can think of now................. :cry:

Deano
10-23-2006, 01:45 PM
married my x-wife...
My brother drilled a hole in a pipe bomb that he already filled with gun powder....good thing the ends were pressed on and not threaded :)

Kilrtoy
10-23-2006, 02:04 PM
Joined ***boat

Her454
10-23-2006, 02:06 PM
17 or 18 years old and driving a 250R out at Glamis at night. Never drank before and had my share of Michelob that day...yuck. Saw some friends of mine in a truck with some other friends following them not too far behind in a buggy.
Nailed the 250 in 2nd gear and went in between them to try and spray the guys in back with sand and never even realized the truck was towing the buggy until the tow strap took me off the bike right at my chest. Flipped me right off the bike and it kept going and ran into a new truck that it took me all summer to pay for. Never drank another drop of Michelob EVER again and I'm a hell of lot more careful at night now when I ride LOL.
Still dont know how I survived that.

VanDeano
10-23-2006, 02:18 PM
Used a SHOP VAC to siffin gasoline. The kicker is that it wasn't that long ago.

Cas
10-23-2006, 02:23 PM
would trying to catch a ratlesnake with your bare hands qualify? I had many experiences with a mini bike without any brakes....I sure wore through a lot of shoes. Jumping in piles of sand from a single story balcony at that same construction site. Do you have any idea how hard wet sand can be?
How about, at about 7 years old, finding a bullet and wanting to know what's inside. Oh boy, a hacksaw will do it and all I need to do is clamp that baby in the vise. Didn't have an explosion but did get it sawed in half.
Anyone remember flexies? I'm lucky to have a face left.

Her454
10-23-2006, 02:30 PM
would trying to catch a ratlesnake with your bare hands qualify? I had many experiences with a mini bike without any brakes....I sure wore through a lot of shoes. Jumping in piles of sand from a single story balcony at that same construction site. Do you have any idea how hard wet sand can be?
How about, at about 7 years old, finding a bullet and wanting to know what's inside. Oh boy, a hacksaw will do it and all I need to do is clamp that baby in the vise. Didn't have an explosion but did get it sawed in half.
Anyone remember flexies? I'm lucky to have a face left.
............Mental note: Make sure my campsite is WAY away from Steve at the next outing.....................

Cas
10-23-2006, 02:38 PM
............Mental note: Make sure my campsite is WAY away from Steve at the next outing.....................
I'm safe now as I realized I'm not a cat and lost count of how many lives I've already been through :D

Her454
10-23-2006, 02:42 PM
I'm safe now as I realized I'm not a cat and lost count of how many lives I've already been through :D
I'll keep my distance anyway, in case the cops show up......... again. :rollside:

topless
10-23-2006, 02:57 PM
One time at lake Piru..........oh thats a different thread. :crossx:

That Guy
10-23-2006, 02:59 PM
One time at lake Piru..........oh thats a different thread. :crossx:
Now, that was funny..... :crossx: :crossx:

Cas
10-23-2006, 03:55 PM
I'll keep my distance anyway, in case the cops show up......... again. :rollside:
and here I thought you were gonna share the campsite with us at Shasta http://www.fishsniffer.com/forumsyabb2006/Smilies/bananachaga.gif
the cops came for you.....geez :D :hammerhea

Thorsinc
10-23-2006, 04:54 PM
When I was 6, I ditched the school bus and walk to school. I took a short cut and had to run across the 101 Freeway. Did it about 3 times.
When I was 10ish we would throw Rocks from a field and break windows on the other side of the wall. One man got so pissed he took out his gun and started shooting at us miss buy just a few feet.
At 11 to 12ish Spent a lot of time playing in the storm drains under the streets.
When I was 13 me and a buddy thought it would be a good idea to go to Mexico, and become Men, and also buy pot and sell it at school. So we stole his father’s car. The next day when we returned, his father was in the driveway of the carport and pulled him out through the window of the car, I never bailed out of a car so fast. I’m still hiding from his dad.

Some Kind Of Monster
10-23-2006, 05:35 PM
I once pulled the drive shaft out of a truck without chocking the wheels. It was on a sloped driveway and the truck about ran me over had it not been for another vehicle behind to stop it. Stupid stupid...
My buddy jumped off the front of my jet boat once. I didn't know that I had to tell him not to jump off of a running boat but I do from not on. He's lucky the skag missed him. He has a big knot on his forehead now and it about knocked him out.
Jeez I have a million of these.

Cheap Thrills
10-23-2006, 05:45 PM
Dumbest things you've done and survived...
Drove a Ford :D
C.T. :wink:

RitcheyRch
10-23-2006, 05:46 PM
When was 10 went against my parents wishes and took my bike up Woodley Hill in Granada Hills. First time went 1/2 way up and had a blast. Second time went to the top. I only remember getting on the bike. Ended up in the hospital with severe concussion, fractured skull and broke every blood vessel in my face. Wasn't expected to live.

beerjet
10-23-2006, 06:00 PM
Repeatedly driving home drunk and not remembering any of the drive or anythying before I actually got in the truck.

Biglue
10-23-2006, 06:12 PM
17 or 18 years old and driving a 250R out at Glamis at night. Never drank before and had my share of Michelob that day...yuck. Saw some friends of mine in a truck with some other friends following them not too far behind in a buggy.
Nailed the 250 in 2nd gear and went in between them to try and spray the guys in back with sand and never even realized the truck was towing the buggy until the tow strap took me off the bike right at my chest. Flipped me right off the bike and it kept going and ran into a new truck that it took me all summer to pay for. Never drank another drop of Michelob EVER again and I'm a hell of lot more careful at night now when I ride LOL.
Still dont know how I survived that.
This and the hiding in the dumpster one are probably the funniest so far.
I'll share on of my bright shinning moments......some of you already heard this one but here it goes again. LOL
When I was in my early 20's me and my buddies were out messing around and getting shit faced. Well I got to the point where I was beyond driving myself home. My one buddy who was half way sober recognized this and arranged for someone to drive his car behind us. So we're on our way and we get off the FWY and are at a focking light that takes forever to change and I had to PISS something awful. I said fock it I have to go. I told my buddy this light takes forever to change and there is no one around but our cars, I'm pissing right here right now. So I open my car door and start relieving myself. All of the sudden my buddy driving my car starts cracking up, then I can hear my other buddies driving behind us start cracking up and I'm like what? What so focking funny I ask my friend. He replies "you dumb ass you're pissing on your door panel" That still comes up at times.......oops :mad: :)

beerjet
10-23-2006, 06:15 PM
I was once the self proclaimed king of beer runs and there wasn't a mini mart , gas station , or liquer store within a five mile radius that I didn't steal beer from multiple times . I didnt buy beer for at least a year before I realized how lucky I was that none of those crazy ass store owners that chased me didn't kill me .

Bradman
10-23-2006, 06:18 PM
When I was 6, I ditched the school bus and walk to school. I took a short cut and had to run across the 101 Freeway. Did it about 3 times.
When I was 10ish we would throw Rocks from a field and break windows on the other side of the wall. One man got so pissed he took out his gun and started shooting at us miss buy just a few feet.
At 11 to 12ish Spent a lot of time playing in the storm drains under the streets.
When I was 13 me and a buddy thought it would be a good idea to go to Mexico, and become Men, and also buy pot and sell it at school. So we stole his father’s car. The next day when we returned, his father was in the driveway of the carport and pulled him out through the window of the car, I never bailed out of a car so fast. I’m still hiding from his dad.
Man Rog, I don't know if I should be associating with such a HOODLUM. :rollside: :rollside: :rollside:

Zaairman
10-23-2006, 06:26 PM
Dumbest things you've done and survived...
Drove a Ford :D
C.T. :wink:
Ah damn, almost forgot. I rode in a Chevy once. Never again.

hoolign
10-23-2006, 06:33 PM
I refuse to answer on this thread! :mad:

Bradman
10-23-2006, 06:46 PM
I grew up in Las Vegas and as teenagers, curising downtown was the thing to do Friday and Saturday nights. This one paticular night in August we were cruising in my buddies car with pot, and bottle rockets "fire crackers". The story goes we were lighting the bottle rockets off the door ledge of my buddies ford fairlane. Somehow one of them ended up in the middle of a crowd of tourists. The next thing we knew we are surrounded by 12 or 15 cop cars with the a helicopter flying over us. They all had there guns drawn and spot lights pointing all over the place. We were all shitting our pants right then and there. They ordered us to put our hands out the window and then exit the car one by one. They had us lay face down on the street which was freakin hot. My one buddy who had the pot shoved it in the headliner of the car. Anyway they searched each of us, tore the car completly apart, did not find the pot but found the bottle rockets. Once they found the bottle rockets some of the cops started to laugh. Someone in the crowd said we shot at them with a gun. The whole time, we thought we were getting busted for the pot! Anyway, they took down my buddies plate number and told him and all of us not to ever come back here again and let us go. That lasted about a week. Scariest night of my life.

DILLIGAF
10-23-2006, 06:56 PM
Mine was riding on Nodiggs boat while he opened the bitch up. It was right after that I considered punching him in the neck and taking his keys from him
:)

LHC Kirby
10-23-2006, 06:57 PM
Had a "little to drink" and hanging with friends (18 or 19 years old) . . . Those "other kids" went by and yelled something . .. never did hear what was said,,, but I KNOW it was not good...
I went looking for them in my car . .. 1971 Mercury Montego, I saw them as I came down the street . . . hit the gas hard . . . they started to run, and I hit the brakes harder . .. sliding stop... throwing it into park . . . jumping out and throwing the baseball bat at them as they scaled a 6 foot fence.... that baseball bat was thrown hard and damn accurate. . . missed the last guy by inches . .. it hit the fence like a perfectly thrown knife . . .just didn't stick..
It wa about this time that I realized that 3-4 nieghbors came out from my sliding stop . . . my buddy quickly grabbed the bat and we departed. . . .
the next night we put a M80 in their mailbox . . . all good now......

lewiville
10-23-2006, 06:58 PM
heres one for the books
ever try barefoot water skiing behind a 30' Sea Ray Pachanga?
early in the moring one Saturday many moon's ago I was bugging the $hit out of my buddies I had to go barefooting. So after many, many, many cocktails they let me have my fill. So, after breakfast at cottenwood cove we went out and then my buddy explains to me " first start out on your back, then spin around" so after borrowing his tennis shoes I jumped in. Not less than 2 minuets after being in the water I said "HIT IT" I heard both of those 454's fire up and I was on my way. Skipping accross the water like Weekend at Bernies. I lost my left shoe, followed by by right shoe, and finaly my suit. So now I am skipping accross Lake Mohave on my back with my Pecker flappin in the wind and I look up at the boat and nobody is driving. After about a half mile on my back the boat stops. I ask what happend and they said they were laughing so hard they where on the floor of the boat.
THE END

Infomaniac
10-23-2006, 07:46 PM
Wow !!! a 250R?? I saw one of those in a museum recently. LOL
17 or 18 years old and driving a 250R out at Glamis at night. Never drank before and had my share of Michelob that day...yuck. Saw some friends of mine in a truck with some other friends following them not too far behind in a buggy.
Nailed the 250 in 2nd gear and went in between them to try and spray the guys in back with sand and never even realized the truck was towing the buggy until the tow strap took me off the bike right at my chest. Flipped me right off the bike and it kept going and ran into a new truck that it took me all summer to pay for. Never drank another drop of Michelob EVER again and I'm a hell of lot more careful at night now when I ride LOL.
Still dont know how I survived that.

Devil's Advocate
10-23-2006, 07:47 PM
link (http://www.***boat.com/forums/showthread.php?t=116048&highlight=dumbest+stunt)
C.T. :wink:
Yeah, I did the pepper up the nose too like the cartoons. Got way more than what I bargained for. :2purples: :D

scooooter7
10-23-2006, 08:34 PM
When I lived in MO we used to drive across state line to Kansas to buy beer(they never checked ID and I was only 17). After having a few I was driving on the freeway towards home in a snow storm with my dad's '66 Galaxy 500, lost control and did a few 360's. I got it straightened out and headed on my way. Now the good part...my buddy had to take a piss so i found a place to pull off the road. But before I could get the car stopped (it was slick out), he opened the door and jumped out. All I could see was his feet in the air because he fell on his ass and started sliding around in circles. Funniest thing I had ever seen.
How we made it home I'll never know, it was one of the worst snow storm in years.

BajaMike
10-23-2006, 08:43 PM
When I was 5 or 6, my brother and I found a bag of bullets in the garage. My dad had brought them back from WWII. I found out later they were 30.06 shells.
For some reason, we thought if we broke them open, we could get a nice pile of gunpowder to make a flare.
My mom caught us, wacking the bullets with a hammer, and we had a pile of gun powder about 3 inches high.....we are lucky none of the bullets went off, I think we had busted open 20 or 30 of them.....stupid!!!!!
We got a good spanking and she called the police to take away the bag of 2000 or 3000 30.06 shells....my dad was pissed!!!

soupersonic
10-23-2006, 08:45 PM
All im going to say is we had a hell of alot of fun with those old fire extinguishers, the one you could take the top off of, refill ( with anything ) and pressurize. Those would shoot a laser of water a good 40 ft.After a while we decided not to carry it around in the car any more :)

Moneypitt
10-23-2006, 08:46 PM
Just a few minutes ago, I THOUGHT about trying to recover Later's boat with a grappling hook, a chest full of beer, and a sober driver to pilot the dragging boat........Does that qualify??????????............MP

Cas
10-23-2006, 09:39 PM
with Halloween just around the corner, it reminded me of another little episode of stupidity I was apart of. I'm thinking I was about 10 or so living on the SF Peninsula. Everyday just about 6:15 this guy would fly up the hill in his Porsche nearly hitting a couple of us in the process. His speeding went on for a couple of months like clockwork. With Halloween coming up we decided to teach the guy a lesson
We got some old clothes and stuffed them with newspapers, leaves and anything else that would fill out the clothes. We pinned the shirt to the pants and the pants to the shoes. For the head we used a coconut tied with a rope to the pants and then duct taped to the shirt.
At about 6pm, we took our little buddy over to the street this guy would speed up and hid behind a car. 6:15 comes around and so does Mr Porsche. At the proper instant, our little buddy was tossed out into Mr. Porsche's path and WHAM! Little buddy was killed instantly! His head went rolling over the top of the car and there was newspaper all over the place. Mr. Porsche was able to stop without running into anything else but he was one pissed off person. He tried chasing us but we already had a huge lead on him and besides, we had split up. He had no clue who we were but he never sped up the hill again.
Back to top

fatboy95
10-23-2006, 09:41 PM
We did this on another board and I haven't laughed so hard in a long time. Here's a couple of mine-
One weekend a dump truck was parked right across the street from our house, I'm about 8 years old. Well, we decided to check out the gas tank, now that I'm older and hopefully smarter, I have to assume it was deisel. Anyway, we decided the only way to find out if there was gas in the tank was to throw a lit match in. Holy crap! The flame that came out of that thing was amazing....a 10ft torch! Put the cap on and it went out, pretty cool. Yep, we did it a couple of more times before my friend's Dad tore us a new one.
The other one involves one of those tractors I mentioned above. Back then we found out they didn't need a key to start the engine. There was ths little switch on the dash that would power things up and a button to start the engine. As luck would have it, we found them and fired one of those puppies up. 3 - 8 year old kids driving a front loader around a huge construction site got us into a ton of trouble.
I can't even imagine what I'd do to my kids if they did half the crap I did as a kid!
Knocked up a Mexican bitch :yuk: :cry:

beerjet
10-23-2006, 09:53 PM
Knocked up a Mexican bitch :yuk: :cry:
Dont worry about it . You can at least smackum and they'll love you even more. :rollside:

YeLLowBoaT
10-23-2006, 10:05 PM
Dated sisters in HS...at the same time. :)

djunkie
10-24-2006, 01:32 AM
Back in 1998 I lawn darted my (new to me) sandrail. Lets just say some more experience could have prevented it. And no I was not drinking.
Sorry for the bad pics. They are a pic of a pic. I don't have a scanner.
Before
http://www.***boat.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=19133&stc=1
After
http://www.***boat.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=19134&stc=1
http://www.***boat.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=19135&stc=1
And my battle wound.
http://www.***boat.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=19136&stc=1

eliminatedsprinter
10-24-2006, 09:32 AM
I got a boat.

DILLIGAF
10-24-2006, 10:01 AM
with Halloween just around the corner, it reminded me of another little episode of stupidity I was apart of. I'm thinking I was about 10 or so living on the SF Peninsula. Everyday just about 6:15 this guy would fly up the hill in his Porsche nearly hitting a couple of us in the process. His speeding went on for a couple of months like clockwork. With Halloween coming up we decided to teach the guy a lesson
We got some old clothes and stuffed them with newspapers, leaves and anything else that would fill out the clothes. We pinned the shirt to the pants and the pants to the shoes. For the head we used a coconut tied with a rope to the pants and then duct taped to the shirt.
At about 6pm, we took our little buddy over to the street this guy would speed up and hid behind a car. 6:15 comes around and so does Mr Porsche. At the proper instant, our little buddy was tossed out into Mr. Porsche's path and WHAM! Little buddy was killed instantly! His head went rolling over the top of the car and there was newspaper all over the place. Mr. Porsche was able to stop without running into anything else but he was one pissed off person. He tried chasing us but we already had a huge lead on him and besides, we had split up. He had no clue who we were but he never sped up the hill again.
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That reminded me of a few times we would get bowling balls out. There was one hill where would could see the cars coming. We were on another hill and we got the timing down perfectly. We would roll the bowling balls down our hill and hit the cars as they came down the other hill.
Another thing I did was fill up a box with dry grass behind our house. I of course thought it was a good idea to light it on fire. When the flames got too big we tried to push the box together to snuff it out but all that did was start a big grass fire. One of my little brothers caught on fire and we had to roll him around to put him out. When the fire department came they wanted to of course question us. Here we were with wet hair (to hide the singed look) talking to the fire investigator. I remember telling them that some big kid with pimples started the fire....lol They weren't buying it. Lucky for me my Dad was in Viet Nam at the time or he would have beat the shit out of me.
Another one: I was about 15 and my brother told me while he was away DO NOT take his bike out. It was a Honda 350 and of course as soon as he left I took the bike out. I drove it around town like some big dog. Anyhow, I am in front of my friends house and said the famous words "Watch this". I proceeded to pop a wheelie way too fast and was coming up to the T intersection. I knew I was going to get hit so I laid it down. ****ed that bike up and landed right on my shoulder as I slid into oncoming traffic. Luckily nobody hit me but I had some explaining to do when my older brother got home. Took an ass whuppin' that time.
I have so many stories to tell. My family is large and we did insane crazy things all the time. One time a brother of mine got stopped when the Pope was in town. He had a friggin' arsenal in his trunk and they thought he was going to assasinate the Pope. They took quite a while to sort that one out....Ahhhhh, the family memories :)

Some Kind Of Monster
10-24-2006, 10:04 AM
Sweet! Did you stitch that up yourself? Thats what I'm talkin about!
I used to ride BMX street semi pro and I hung up on a trash can once. It sent me over my handlebars at about 30mph and straight into the pavement. I destroyed my elbow and thumb and it ruined my basketball career that I had high hopes for at the time.
Another time we were cruising our bikes through a canal tunnel. My "buddy" put a bar up about eye level and didn't tell me. I was flying out of the tunnel and hit the bar just above my nose. I woke up several minutes later in a world of pain.
We were riding bikes with this moron that decided to check how tight his chain was while pedaling. He stuck his finger down there and cut it clean off in the sprocket. Probably the dumbest thing I have ever seen anyone do. They couldn't put it back on either.

Some Kind Of Monster
10-24-2006, 10:07 AM
When I was about 11 my cousin and I set up a trampoline next to the 5 foot deep pool. We had a great time jumping into the pool from the tramp. I decided to "suicide" dive into the pool and I kissed the bottom of the pool with my face. Still have that nice scar.
I like to think that these dumb occurances have made me smarter than I would have been without them :crossx:

Her454
10-24-2006, 11:41 AM
the cops came for you.....geez :D :hammerhea
Details, details. Whatever. :rollside: The important thing was I didnt need bail money that night.
This and the hiding in the dumpster one are probably the funniest so far.
If you think thats bad, I'll tell you the rest........ my girlfriends took me home that night after my little stunt....and I passed out in the truck on the way home from the dunes. Not before puking all over the side of it with my head hanging out the window tho............ She was pissed and took her truck to the car wash and sprayed it all off..........with my head still out the window. She sprayed the truck AND me while I layed there and couldn't do anything but wish I was dead.
Thank God the internet was not around then.

donzi5150
10-24-2006, 11:56 AM
When I was a senior in high school: egging a bunch of transvestite hookers downtown and being shot at (shotgun) by their redneck pimp. A chase ensued at speeds of over 100 mph........during that drive a 5th of Jack was wounded by all the occupants of my car! :)

707dog
10-24-2006, 12:17 PM
Married And Divorsed A Closet Tweeker..amazing What You Can Find If Ya Just Turn On The Light :idea: ...lmao..

chase8
10-24-2006, 01:00 PM
I once tried juggling two gilfriends at once. Was real difficult on holidays, especially valentines day when they were both planing to spend the night. Guess they were smarter than I thought. One day they both showed up at my door together.
Guess they had gotten together and exchanged stories etc.
The look on my face when I opened the door must have been priceless! Funny thing is, I married one of them. Been happy
for 9 yrs. Oh, one more really stupid thing.......I began playing golf.. Need I say more. Stupid game, what can one expect from a game developed by dudes who wear skirts. Gotta go, T-time is at 3:25.

UltraClean
10-24-2006, 01:11 PM
Dated sisters in HS...at the same time. :)....you are my hero!!!!
four wheeling up at Hollister Hills in a buddys Samurai...rolled over no seat belt...hand was smashed under roll cage when i held on...couldve been my head under roll cage....stupid stupid...my hand looked like the Hamburger Helper hand for a month!

fourspeednup
10-24-2006, 01:19 PM
3rd-4th grade and had just listened to a fire and brimstone speech by the health teacher about the dangers of smoking/drinking/etc. Back at my buddy's house we decided to come up with safer alternatives to smoking cigs LOL
Pulled a dried chili pepper off a tree in his back yard, found his dads lighter and lit that bitch up while inhaling deep on the other end. I think in that one pull I did more damage to my lungs than RD in his entire smoking career :crossx:
A couple years later I was at a neighborhood block party bored out of my mind and decided it would be a great idea to kick the chock out from a dumpster wheel sitting on a hill with a good 15*+ slope. That sucker got going pretty good before getting little sideways and toppled over sending the constuction materials all over the street and blocking all traffic. At this young age I learned how the key to getting out of trouble was to deny everything :p If that thing had hit a car.....WOW :skull:

donzi5150
10-24-2006, 01:24 PM
Dated three best friends at the same time in high school. The second one approached me behind her friends back and we started to date as a secret and then the third approached me and the next thing I know I was telling her about this "arrangement" and she said "thats was fine, she would be the third" This lasted about 8 months till I moved on and then all hell broke loose..........It was a damn good 8 months! :rollside:

Norseman
10-24-2006, 01:39 PM
Details, details. Whatever. :rollside: The important thing was I didnt need bail money that night.
If you think thats bad, I'll tell you the rest........ my girlfriends took me home that night after my little stunt....and I passed out in the truck on the way home from the dunes. Not before puking all over the side of it with my head hanging out the window tho............ She was pissed and took her truck to the car wash and sprayed it all off..........with my head still out the window. She sprayed the truck AND me while I layed there and couldn't do anything but wish I was dead.
Thank God the internet was not around then.
Traci
We need pictures!!!!!!
Bob

79Challenger
10-24-2006, 01:45 PM
When I was 5 or 6, my brother and I found a bag of bullets in the garage. My dad had brought them back from WWII. I found out later they were 30.06 shells.
For some reason, we thought if we broke them open, we could get a nice pile of gunpowder to make a flare.
My mom caught us, wacking the bullets with a hammer, and we had a pile of gun powder about 3 inches high.....we are lucky none of the bullets went off, I think we had busted open 20 or 30 of them.....stupid!!!!!
We got a good spanking and she called the police to take away the bag of 2000 or 3000 30.06 shells....my dad was pissed!!!
I have got one similar.... I was 7 or 8 and my dad took me shooting. I found live .22 in the dirt and my pop threw it in the bushes. So naturally when I found more of them I did let him know. fast forward 24 hours; A sunday afternoon, after showing off the rounds in Sunday school I took them home. I am not sure where I got the idea, but I ended up in the backyard sittting indian style whacking the hell out of one of the rounds with my aluminum baseball bat. It went something like this this... *tink*tink* BANG! I jump up and start yelling hello, hello as my mom comes running out of the house.
I end up at the ER getting the powder scrubbed out of the insides of my thighs and calves with well a scrub brush and iodine. A potion of the shell went into the bottom of my foot and required 5 or 6 stitches.
A week later I found the lead laying on the patio, I was shaking so bad when I picked it up I almost couldn't throw it into the nieghbors yard.

79Challenger
10-24-2006, 01:53 PM
Here is another. This one wasn't too long after the .22 incident.
I find a smelling salt and rip the packaging open to reveal a glass vial with some pinkish liquid in it (ammonia!). I am not sure why but I put the vial in my mouth as I adjusted the micro machines (toy cars) along the track I had set up; where else, but in the sandy bottom of a terrerium in my room that was currently housing a tarantula.
The spider comes running out of the burrow freaks me out and I bite down. I race to the bathroom and immediatly rinse my mouth with water. When I spit out comes water and something white. Looking in the mirrior with my mouth open I literally peel the skin/tasebuds off of my tounge.
in the hospital. End up with some numbing gel for my mouth barley eating and not speaking for a couple weeks.

Norseman
10-24-2006, 01:53 PM
In high school I went to a party at a buddies. His parents were out of town and we decided it was party time. I managed to score 6 cases of beer prior to the party and stuck it iced down in coolers into the trunk of my 62 Chevy. Huge trunk lots of room, well Tony didn't want any bottles laying around so we figured we'd have everyone throw the empties back in the trunk.
Good idea, right
Got stopped by the cops about 3 days later and it seemed I'd forgotten to empty out the trunk. car smelt like the Budwiser brewery and must have had 150 empties clanking around in the trunk.
Took me the better part of 2 hours to talk the cop out of locking my ass up. He had me walking forward and backwards, touching my nose with my finger and every other subriety check he could think of. Finally called the desk Sargent who was a family friend, and he told them to cut me loose.
Of course it did happen to come up in conversation with my father that weekend. Needless to say he was not happy and neither was I.

seanv
10-24-2006, 01:56 PM
Got on a bull named Airtime because they wanted to buck him and nobody would get on him. I had ridden him twice already and figured he would be fun to get on again.
He was really nervous in the chutes and wouldn't stay still so I called my gate with him leaning on my left leg.
He blew up right in my face and started spinning inside the chute without leaving it!!!!
I stuck it to him for about 2 and a half rounds and got rocked outside of him. When I tried to make a move to get back on top of him, he turned on the gas and I hit my shoulder on the chute. This ripped me off the top of him.
Over???
No,
I hung up to him and couldn't get free. He dragged me underneath him and stepped all over me. When my rope popped free, I lifted my head and BOOM!!! He planted one of his hooves right in the middle of my face breaking my nose in 4 spots and cracking a cheak bone.
I ended up with a shoulder with all of the skin missing from it. You could see how the human shoulder worked if I showed you. I also ended up getting sinus surgery with a little rhynoplasty (sp?) as well.
It was magical...
I look back on my rodeo days and have no idea how I did it.
LOL! i cant even begin to count the horses i got on that rocked my world. valentines day yuma rodeo, bronc's name was one spot and she broke my jaw.
8 weeks later cave creek az buckskin run 2 jumped over the swells and that was a broken wrist. window rock during cowboy christmas billy etbauer sits me down on one spot and told me to get ready for this horse to run to the middle of the arena and blow big time. well, he did just that and the last jump he thru me...broken hip...
great life experiance and life long friends made doing this but, DAMN it was hard on the bod.

Norseman
10-24-2006, 01:57 PM
One of the dumbest things I ever saw was a guy putting 2X4 into his car. He had them sticking out the passenger side window. Well I guess they stuck out a little further than he thought because when he pulled out of the parking lot he caught a street sign with the end of the boards. Took the side windows out and bent the post on the drivers side. The driver got lucky and fell over on the seat and they missed his head.

Norseman
10-24-2006, 02:00 PM
Driving into Newark Airport one afternoon and about three cars up I see a guy try to dart onto one of the exit ramps, the ramp goes off on an angle.
Seems he ended up with one tire one each side of the curb, and as the angle grew further apart it bent the wheels out sideways. Lots of sparks and screetching of metal too!!

Some Kind Of Monster
10-24-2006, 02:10 PM
I have an unhealthy obsession with fire/speed/and noise. I throw a hell of a party though. You can see me standing in front of the fire!
During my spare time I enjoy making explosives to test in the desert (not to hurt anyone but myself of course). My favorite is a dish washer sealed shut with an oxy/acetelyne mixture with a brake fluid/chlorine fuse. Sucker will blow a 5ft hole in the earth.
Not smart, but sure is fun!
http://www.***boat.com/image_center/data/500/1683DSC04566.JPG

79Challenger
10-24-2006, 02:12 PM
Okay last one. This one was in junior high school. I was very into things that go Boom. Not sure how, ut my science teacher told mt buddy and I how to make a contact expolsive out of iodine crystals and... damn I don't remember what. It was a liquid though, I want to say it was ammonia. Mixing the crystals with the mystery liquid then starining them and leaving them to dry created a contact explosive which my teacher made in class. This little bit (the size of a dime) was enough to ruin the eraser of the pencil he tapped it with.
I aquire some of the mystery liquide and steal some crystal from teach. I make about eight ounces of the stuff letting it dry overnight (the dryer the more volitile). Pouring my new explosive off of the paper plate it had been drying on in my closet I notice it isn't level in the drinking glass it was being poured into. So while looking over the top of it I start tapping on the side of the glass. Another *tink*tink*BANG. Right in my face!
I run to the bathroom to rinse my eyes and my mom come running. When the iodine on my face got wet it turned blood red and my mom freaked out! She thinks I blew my head off. Meanwhile my only injury was I couldn't see. just a grey haze and some shapes.
Now I am in the ER and I have what looks like plungers placed under my eyekids over my eyeballs and have saleen run over them for 30 minutes. Then at the Pacific Eye Institue, the nurse (a male nurse!?), tell me he was an explosives expert in the Army for 13 years and they used the same stuff as an alert for approaching foot traffic! Patches on and cream in my eyes for a week; Good as new.

Her454
10-24-2006, 02:14 PM
I have an unhealthy obsession with fire/speed/and noise. I throw a hell of a party though. You can see me standing in front of the fire!
During my spare time I enjoy making explosives to test in the desert (not to hurt anyone but myself of course). My favorite is a dish washer sealed shut with an oxy/acetelyne mixture with a brake fluid/chlorine fuse. Sucker will blow a 5ft hole in the earth.
Not smart, but sure is fun!
http://www.***boat.com/image_center/data/500/1683DSC04566.JPG
You and I would be dangerous together. I have the same sick obsessions LOL.

Cas
10-24-2006, 04:05 PM
some pretty hilarious stuff here! :D :D

termiteguy
10-24-2006, 04:10 PM
Okay last one. This one was in junior high school. I was very into things that go Boom. Not sure how, ut my science teacher told mt buddy and I how to make a contact expolsive out of iodine crystals and... damn I don't remember what. It was a liquid though, I want to say it was ammonia. Mixing the crystals with the mystery liquid then starining them and leaving them to dry created a contact explosive which my teacher made in class. This little bit (the size of a dime) was enough to ruin the eraser of the pencil he tapped it with.
I aquire some of the mystery liquide and steal some crystal from teach. I make about eight ounces of the stuff letting it dry overnight (the dryer the more volitile). Pouring my new explosive off of the paper plate it had been drying on in my closet I notice it isn't level in the drinking glass it was being poured into. So while looking over the top of it I start tapping on the side of the glass. Another *tink*tink*BANG. Right in my face!
I run to the bathroom to rinse my eyes and my mom come running. When the iodine on my face got wet it turned blood red and my mom freaked out! She thinks I blew my head off. Meanwhile my only injury was I couldn't see. just a grey haze and some shapes.
Now I am in the ER and I have what looks like plungers placed under my eyekids over my eyeballs and have saleen run over them for 30 minutes. Then at the Pacific Eye Institue, the nurse (a male nurse!?), tell me he was an explosives expert in the Army for 13 years and they used the same stuff as an alert for approaching foot traffic! Patches on and cream in my eyes for a week; Good as new.
dude no offince butt you were a stupid kid glad you live thru it and could share your stories here :crossx:

Cas
10-24-2006, 04:29 PM
dude no offince butt you were a stupid kid glad you live thru it and could share your stories here :crossx:
LMAO! :D

Aqua Boogie1
10-25-2006, 09:51 AM
A few few years back, I got pissed off at my 2nd wife coming from a restuarant. I wanted out of the car but we were going about 50 mph on the freeway. Well lets just say, Im glad the cars behind us wasn't tail gating!!!!! Spent a few days in John Muir Hospital for that one. :rolleyes: