How Do You Know When She's the One?

[OliverM5]

I've been dating a great girl for about 6 months now, but we have our differences on paper. Our Religions, backgrounds, and upbringings are different, but despite this, we have an amazing time when were together - something special that neither of us has felt before. She treats me amazingly....I know my family is gonna give me hell because of our diffferences and sometimes feel like our differences will cause problems down the line...I need some advice from you guys that have experience in this area.....let's here the opinions.....

[Boatcop]

Can't say exactly what it is.
You just know.

[QuickJet]

What are your differences and why would your family be so opposed to her?

[Devil's Advocate]

You won't have to think about it, you'll already know it and feel it. :)

[beerjet]

I dated my wife for eight years before I asked her to marry me .
Time will tell . You are not goin to benefit from anything by getting married . So I would suggest dating for as long as you possibly can .

[atomickitn]

all your family should do is be supportive of you and your decision , .......you love her ? she loves you? f**k everybody else :cool:

[Kilrtoy]

Screw your family...
If she is the one, then do what is right for you

[slink]

When the HB crowd gives you the green light :)

[98 Vector 21]

6 months? you dont need to rush anything....

[beerjet]

I'm gonna agree with killer on this but the only thing that catches my eye is .......
I've been dating a great girl for about 6 months now

[OliverM5]

6 months? you dont need to rush anything....
I'm not planning on doing anything anytime soon...it takes at least a good year, probably two, to get to know someone on a basic level. I'm just wondering if I should continue this relationship knowing we have the differences (at least on paper) and the family issues that will come up....

[beerjet]

I'm not planning on doing anything anytime soon...it takes at least a good year, probably two, to get to know someone on a basic level. I'm just wondering if I should continue this relationship knowing we have the differences (at least on paper) and the family issues that will come up....
Dont put all your eggs in one basket .

[slowinhavasu]

I'm not planning on doing anything anytime soon...it takes at least a good year, probably two, to get to know someone on a basic level. I'm just wondering if I should continue this relationship knowing we have the differences (at least on paper) and the family issues that will come up....
Ok heres the deal, think of every girl you have ever had feelings for.....now think of the gal your trippin on.....would you want one of the others , or her....
If it's her....then she's the one...the family will catch up later...
Good luck...........

[No Name]

When the HB crowd gives you the green light :)
Stop and back up. :D :D

[IMPATIENT 1]

would you step in frt. of a bullet for her????? if the immediate answer in your head is yes, take another yr. for all the abnormal quirks to show their heads, then get married. i dated my wife off and on for @4yrs before we got married, i've known her from the time she was 10 and is was 12.

[Boatcop]

What are your differences and why would your family be so opposed to her?
I think it's the whole hump and bell tower deal. But who am I to judge?
J/K :D

[OliverM5]

I'm also afraid that any resistance from my family will drive her away....but then again, if it does and she walks away, I don't think she's the right person anyways...

[IMPATIENT 1]

I'm also afraid that any resistance from my family will drive her away....but then again, if it does and she walks away, I don't think she's the right person anyways...
hey, your family has no idea whats right for you! my mom hates my wife. my wife is a great mother, all 3 kids have straight a's, she takes care of me, and she loves my dumbass. i chose my wife over my mom, and i can honestly say it was the rite decision for me. i love my wife, she's a great person and i hope she sticks around when i'm old and pissin all over my self :p don't let your parents dream's for your life become yours, you won't be happy

[b's sanger]

Ask yourself if she's the one you want to grow old with.

[YeLLowBoaT]

if you have to ask, shes not the one.
now if she is rich or can suck a golf ball thru a garden hose... then she is the one. :crossx:

[River918]

Does she have a Rhino? (or want one)?

[Excessive Force]

Whatever you do make sure to live with her first. And when doing so its for a minimum of one year. :crossx: serious.

[voodoomedman]

If you have to tell yourself you love her then it's not the real thing. If no matter what you do, you can't get her off your mind and every fiber of your being is telling you that she is the one then you have your answer. I started falling in love with my wife the very first night I met her. I have been on cloud nine ever since. I would have married her after a couple of months but we were only 19. So we bought our waverunner instead. Got married 2 and a half years later, still happy as can be, married 5 years, still have the waverunner (and a boat) but most importantly a 20 month old boy and a bun in the oven. Point is........Only you know and when you know then you know. It's cliche but you just know when you know.

[BreastManWins]

When you've spent enough time with her to want to be with your buddies and then you find out if she's OK with that, then you're almost ready to ask her to marry you.
Have you met her parents, specifically her mother? What is she like as a person? What does she look like? You girlfriend will be a lot like her and look a lot like her when she gets older. One of the best ways to tell about a woman is to check her mother out closely.
Don't be in a rush. If she's good enough to marry she's (and you) good enough to wait for.

[socalmoney]

Lots of people over look religion when they are dating and all is fine till you get married and have a kid. I know a lot of people who all the sudden became religious after having a kid (since it is a miracle to give birth (give me a break) and now they are at odds with each other. Better get that in check before you make the plunge.

[djunkie]

all your family should do is be supportive of you and your decision , .......you love her ? she loves you? f**k everybody else :cool:
Exactly. Forget what everyone else says. Your the one dating her not them. If they care for you then they'll be happy with whoever you decide to date/marry. Well unless shes a complete freak. :rollside:

[djunkie]

Does she have a Rhino? (or want one)?
Nice!!!! Posts like this make me wanna start even more Rhino threads. :crossx: :crossx: :crossx: :crossx: :crossx:

[dschifan]

ask yourself this, everyone has a little jealousy in them...are you more jealous with her than other past girls? Jealousy meaning in a good way cause you care about her alot. Do you trust her? Usually when you cannot be without a girl you become a little jealous cause you never want to lose her, that helped me to determine my girl was the one since i have never felt like that.

[centerhill condor]

when she buys you a boat for engagement! :)

[91nordic29]

where are tom brown and ratso when ya need 'em, lol! al you have to do is get thier opinions and and the answer is somwhere in the middle. :)
seriously, though, if you are involving the family in your decision, they will be there for the rest of your life. right in the center. and not in a good way. ever watch "everobody loves raymond"?
you should work on your family first. any issues that they have that you dont agree with may not go away but make sure that they arent going to influence your decisions when it comes to a partner. you must be ready to choose your partner over your family, no matter what even if you dont think she is right. where parent/family are concerned, when you get married, your spuose has to be number one.
now off my soap box, lol!

[Boatcop]

When it's all said and done, you don't marry someone because you can live with them.
You marry them because you can't live without them.

[catman-do]

Whatever you do make sure to live with her first. And when doing so its for a minimum of one year. :crossx: serious.
DING DING DING!!! This is the one I agree with most. My gf and I have been together now for a couple years. Have owned a house together for a year. Now after living with her for a year i know all the little things that might bug every once in a while, but more important I know how wonderful of a person she really is. Hell I bought her an engagement ring yesterday. Was going to propose at the festival of lights parade in Havi, but found out she is hanging out with her mom, since we will be in glamis for thanks giving.
Dude, LIVE WITH HER FIRST!!! Ive lived with three now and wanted to drown two of them!

[Thorsinc]

I've been dating a great girl for about 6 months now, but we have our differences on paper. Our Religions, backgrounds, and upbringings are different, but despite this, we have an amazing time when were together - something special that neither of us has felt before. She treats me amazingly....I know my family is gonna give me hell because of our diffferences and sometimes feel like our differences will cause problems down the line...I need some advice from you guys that have experience in this area.....let's here the opinions.....
How old are you?

[Devil's Advocate]

DING DING DING!!! This is the one I agree with most. My gf and I have been together now for a couple years. Have owned a house together for a year. Now after living with her for a year i know all the little things that might bug every once in a while, but more important I know how wonderful of a person she really is. Hell I bought her an engagement ring yesterday. Was going to propose at the festival of lights parade in Havi, but found out she is hanging out with her mom, since we will be in glamis for thanks giving.
Dude, LIVE WITH HER FIRST!!! Ive lived with three now and wanted to drown two of them!
I agree with the living together first. And good luck with popping the question!! :rollside:

[CBadDad]

We'll need pics to help you decide.
:cool:

[OliverM5]

How old are you?
Turned 30 in March :)

[phebus]

After six months, it's time to take off the training wheels, and ride her hard. If you don't get hurt, she's the one.

[Forkin' Crazy]

Whatever you do make sure to live with her first. And when doing so its for a minimum of one year. :crossx: serious.
That is BS. I am living proof of that. Lived with my X for a little over a year before we got married. 7 years later she got the itch. :mad:
Do some serious soul searching.
"How sill you know when she's the one?"
When you have your 50th anniversary! :)

[Drift]

I don't want to burst your bubble but it is imprtant that you take you and her feelings into consideration at this point.
Basically if you have to ask, then she's not the "one". To get to this point only after 6 months? Statistically you are not headed in the right direction. Ad all this to the statement that you can't agree on the basic fundamentals that a mariage is based on.
I she means alot to you I would give it more time... find something that is more substantail than we have an "amazing time together" to base your future on. The fact is that 6 months is just a drop in the bucket, you need to have a lot more in common. Religion, potential parenting skills, politics and a sense of self. If you ask, most people will tell you that a mariage is a 50-50 situation. Unfortunately we also have a very high devorce rate and I belive the 50-50 viewpoint is part of the problem. Most married couples/families I know that have weathered some pretty bad situations have all had a diffferent take on it. A real marriage is a 100-100 situation. You must have the willingness to give it all without the expectation of getting anything in return. Without a doubt there will come a time where this will happen, at this point is where most will fail. Your personal character and comonalities with eachother will help you get through these times and the more things you can agree apon the better. This is why the foundation of your relationship is so important. The ability to have both sides of your extended family support you, your beliefs, ideas of upbringing, morality and politcs all play imprtant roles when life turns on you and your wife / husband looses their shine. It may sound corny but I suggest that you listen to Dr. Laura. You may find some pretty good info that may help you make decissions.

[Biglue]

Unless you're Jewish and she's Muslim you guys can probably resolve the religion differences. 6 Months is a very short time, although I'm sure there is cases where people have jumped at marriage within these lengths of time and have worked out. Just remember, that the more time you guys take to know each other the more you can accept your differences. Take your time, if she appreciates you like you appreciate her, things will only get even better. It would be better to find out you guys are a mismatch over the next couple years instead of over a couple children. Best of luck.

[Tom Brown]

I'd stab her in the ass. If she doesn't say anything about it, you've got a keeper.
where are tom brown and ratso when ya need 'em, lol!
I doubt Ratso will come into this thread. :idea:

[Devil's Advocate]

I doubt Ratso will come into this thread. :idea:
No, he'd be on the "How do you know she's NOT the one?" thread. :crossx:

[Jbb]

I'd stab her in the ass. If she doesn't say anything about it, you've got a keeper.
I doubt Ratso will come into this thread. :idea:
Ditto.... :p

[a catered life]

6 months? you dont need to rush anything....
i must agree to this but i live by these rules for any relationship...i fell these are the only three things that can break up a relationship
1. sex (lack of, too much, sex outside the relationship,etc)
2 . inlaws (they dislike you, or spend to much time at your crib, etc)
3 . money (lack of, uncontrolable speeding, too much, etc)
anything outside of these 3 can be handled....if its true love but these three will continue to erode away what your trying to build.....hey its only 6 months give it time and remember both of you have to make to decision to stick together thru the thick and thin.... and if its true PUCk the haters

[SHAKE-YO-AZZ]

all your family should do is be supportive of you and your decision , .......you love her ? she loves you? f**k everybody else :cool:
yeah what he said times 2

[ROZ]

I don't care what people say, religion (christianity as a whole v. other beliefs) may really matter later on in life... We tend to go back to it as we get older...So:
A family that prays together, stays together.
I am not a bible thumper. Just what I've experienced.
Also, if you have ANY hint of doubt whatsoever, don't do it. Get the f out, the relationship will fail.
My grandparents knew each other for 10 days before they tied the knot. They were married until my grandfather died in the 80's. Soo after he died, my grandmother bought the Caddy she always wanted ..So what's that tell ya.
6 months is too early. You have know idea of what you're getting in to. At least wait a year.

[riverbound]

I've been dating a great girl for about 6 months now, but we have our differences on paper. Our Religions, backgrounds, and upbringings are different, but despite this, we have an amazing time when were together - something special that neither of us has felt before. She treats me amazingly....I know my family is gonna give me hell because of our diffferences and sometimes feel like our differences will cause problems down the line...I need some advice from you guys that have experience in this area.....let's here the opinions.....
All of those "little" problems will turn in to "big" problems down the road. I was in the same boat. and needless to say, I am now going through a divorce (we were together 6 years before we married).
But good luck to you.

[FASTJTBT]

Can she back a trailer down the ramp? If so shes a keeper.

[76ANTHONY]

marriage??? what the hell for??? buy a rhino and a boat and then stay on here all day, why get married???? :crossx: oh wait, thats djunkies philosophy :crossx: :crossx: :crossx:

[seanv]

all your family should do is be supportive of you and your decision , .......you love her ? she loves you? f**k everybody else :cool:
the best right there. if you love eachother and respect eachother live together and give it a whirl. remember, they dont have to live with her, you do.

[Nord]

Religion will be a factor later on. Are we talking the difference between Lutheran and Christian??
Or Morman and Catholic??
My best friend just finished up a divorce of this same issue!!!
Which is it??

[SnoopJonnyJon]

I agree that religion will be a major problem, depending on how big the differences are and how devote either of you are too. If the religion is way off then let's face it, you both think each other are going to go to hell, so there will be a constant effort to try to convert each other. Let's say you are Pentecostal and she is Mennonite. I would say just go for it, maybe start going to an Alliance church or some other more inter-denominational protestant church and basically just go through the Bible together and make your own beliefs based on that instead of what the official pamphlet at the back of the church says. There's no reason you shouldn't be able to work it out so long as you both believe in the Bible. Now... if she is a Muslim... might as well forget it, IMO.

[Jetaholic]

Does she have a Rhino? (or want one)?
Better yet, does she have a treadmill?
This thread is useless without pics! :)

[LHC Kirby]

[Screw your family...
If she is the one, then do what is right for you[/QUOTE]
Friends & family = I would take advice of the MY family anyday of the week over friends. But than I have a very close family and very close friends too . . . but family first.... you would be marrying her and HER FAMILY as she is marrying yours too.
As boat cop put it best at the near beginning of this thread - YOU JUST KNOW IT . . . .
14 + years and my sig lines say's it all . . . . .

[ratso]

For starters, you can say "Screw your family", but is she willing to go that distance with hers if need be??? :idea: I am Catholic, and could care less what someone elses religion is, but then I'm not getting married. I never married a Catholic in the past, which wasn't a big deal with my family or any of my wives at the time. I don't do church much, mainly weddings and funerals, and my reasons are a whole different story. I see whoever sparks my interest, even with one being Church Of Christ and another is a Mormon, but these are just hook ups. Would it work being married to either of them. Hell no... :squiggle: They were brought up in strict households and their parents would never accept me. :notam: Being brought up in a household such as that has a huge bearing on a relationship, even with them being somewhat of rebels at different points in their lives with their parents... they would never disown them. Like it or not, these beliefs are driven into their heads since day one. The guilt trip these parents would pull on their daughters would doom a relationship, :jawdrop: no doubt. I can promise you an even huger issue would be how to bring the kids up if you plan on having them, if your beliefs are that far apart. One of my sisters was dead set on being married in the church, and after a bunch of BS to go through on his part, he converted over to Catholicism... it lasted long enough to have 2 kids over about ten years... but then that's practically the majority of marriages anyway... they end. I don't know what he considers himself now. I would ride this thing out if you truly love her and put marriage on the back burner for awhile. These issues need to be resolved before walking down the aisle, between you two, and the families. If one of you have to "change" too much, believe me, after a few years when things start to get boring and hum drum, the resentment will start to set in.
On a final note, most marriages don't last. An even larger percentage have one or both spouses cheating on each other down the road, give or take about 7 years... As a catered life stated, you have to get past the "sex, in-laws, and money" issues, which are going to change at different times in your lives depending on whatever outside factors are influencing your relationship... and you want to throw religion in on top of all that... good luck. I'd just chill, enjoy the ride, and if it starts to get too bumpy, step off and move on. :wink: ...but don't get married just yet.

[Tom Brown]

"Screw your family"
Boy.... you really don't have any limits.

[ratso]

Boy.... you really don't have any limits.
lmao Tom... :D I didn't mean for him to say it... I was hypothetically speaking because that's kind of the drift I was getting from this thread. I was just stating that "if" he did that, would she be willing to do the same? Still lmao! :D

[EAZYKILLER2006]

Ok heres the deal, think of every girl you have ever had feelings for.....now think of the gal your trippin on.....would you want one of the others , or her....
If it's her....then she's the one...the family will catch up later...
Good luck...........
yea never mind about the family~ everyone was against me AND HUBBY CUS WE WERE SO (gosh now that i think about it we were...) OH YOUNG ~ MY CP IS TRIPIN damn caps ~well anyways if we listened to them...we wouldnt be where we r today ~lookie where we are now HAPPY 24 years later~any mommy didnt like him till year 20 of our marriage ...but i didnt care...bad mommy

[ratso]

yea never mind about the family~ everyone was against me AND HUBBY CUS WE WERE SO (gosh now that i think about it we were...) OH YOUNG ~ MY CP IS TRIPIN damn caps ~well anyways if we listened to them...we wouldnt be where we r today ~lookie where we are now HAPPY 24 years later~any mommy didnt like him till year 20 of our marriage ...but i didnt care...bad mommy
Honestly, I do like to hear of the ones that seem to be making it, but you EAZYKILLER are a little different than most of the women out there nowdays, judging by a few of your posts... and trust me, it's in a refreshing kind of way... Congrats. :D

[EAZYKILLER2006]

Honestly, I do like to hear of the ones that seem to be making it, but you EAZYKILLER are a little different than most of the women out there nowdays, judging by a few of your posts... and trust me, it's in a refreshing kind of way... Congrats. :D
naw its not even like that actually its just my hubby is different than most men ...he is a man and like i said before doesnt put up with bs...yea he said your family is tryin to start shit they have to go...so i was like yea u r rite so i stayed away till the treated him with respect ( 4 years ago i guess they~ my family~ stopped haten' and finally gave up and started treating him rite ) the sad part is my mom and dad missed out on 2 great boys my sons...

[OliverM5]

Religion will be a factor later on. Are we talking the difference between Lutheran and Christian??
Or Morman and Catholic??
My best friend just finished up a divorce of this same issue!!!
Which is it??
I am Jewish and she is Catholic....she brought up the religion issue and said she was open to raising our family in my religion and learning about it for herself as well....I have the impression that she is not very passionate about her religion now and that it is not a big deal for her....

[EAZYKILLER2006]

I'm gonna agree with killer on this but the only thing that catches my eye is .......
hey i am killer he is rrrrr :crossx: toy...

[SHOTKALLIN]

6 MONTHS = MARRIAGE??? WTF?
post a pic. Have the balls to post a pic. Is this your first piece or what? Does your mommy know you are posting on hot boat?

[catman-do]

she will tell you when the time is right
This guy MUST be married!!! He already knows how the game works. SHE will tell YOU when its the right time. Just put your balls out there for her to grab onto, every man thats married in here will say the woman dictates what goes down to a certain extent. Including her :cry: