Drinks?

[Big Warlock]

The Value of a Drink
Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink
I feel shame Then I look into the glass and think
about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes
and dreams . If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out
of work and their dreams would be shattered.
Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their
dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack Handy
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra and panties
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they
wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're
going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are
laughing WITH you.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not"
~ Stephen Wright
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk,
we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all
get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an
idiot.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Without question, the greatest invention in the
history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the
wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does
not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over
and over again that you love them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can!
~ Dave Howell
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically
converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers
One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to
his buddy Norm.
Here's how it went:
"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this. A herd of buffalo can only move as fast
as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and
weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is
good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the
whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.
In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the
slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain
cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.
In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells,
making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always
feel smarter after a few beers."

[Jordy]

Amen!!! :D

[HCS]

That's great!
I'll drink to that.

[Jordy]

When I first read the title of this thread I figured you were having a rough morning and were ready to meet up somewhere for a 3 martini breakfast. Now I'm a trooper and all, but 9 AM seems kind of problematic for me, unless it's Mexico, the weekend, or out on the water somewhere. :D :D :D

[Stingray69]

Sometimes, not very often, but just every once in a while, as I tie up the 13 gallon kitchen trashbag full of empty beer cans, that I, alone, have caused to be filled, there is this brief span of time that I sense that it's kinda sad, when you think about it, how much beer you can actually drink, just during the time when the sun is up.
But then I pitch the trashbag into the back of the Silverado, grab another beer out of the cooler, and start wiping down the boat, so I can cover it and drop it off and then head off to the fire, for the party that night. And that moment passes quickly away...

[Big Warlock]

When I first read the title of this thread I figured you were having a rough morning and were ready to meet up somewhere for a 3 martini breakfast. Now I'm a trooper and all, but 9 AM seems kind of problematic for me, unless it's Mexico, the weekend, or out on the water somewhere. :D :D :D
Naw, my day is going well. Just have my hands full with different things. I don't post very often, but I thought this little write up woulod be appropriate for many HBers. Of course you never came to mind at all!! :D
Where is your X-Mas present??? Maybe it will be a birthday present by the time it's all said and done. :)

[Jordy]

Of course you never came to mind at all!! :D
Of course I didn't. :)
Where is your X-Mas present??? Maybe it will be a birthday present by the time it's all said and done. :)
No shit. I did tell you that I charge Christmas present interest from the date of notification of said present up to the point of its' arrival and acceptance. :D :D :D
Then again, I can understand how much work goes into getting that 65' Viking custom painted with a "JORDYADO" so I'll let you slide. ;)
Oh, and presents that were designated as Christmas presents also aren't accepted later as birthday presents. Just ask your better half as I'm sure she feels the same way. :)

[DaddyMack]

When I first read the title of this thread I figured you were having a rough morning and were ready to meet up somewhere for a 3 martini breakfast. Now I'm a trooper and all, but 9 AM seems kind of problematic for me, unless it's Mexico, the weekend, or out on the water somewhere. :D :D :D
My theory is, that if you don't start drinking in the morning.. it's impossible to drink all day..:)

[Jordy]

My theory is, that if you don't start drinking in the morning.. it's impossible to drink all day..:)
Hey, I like your thinking!!! :D :D :D

[Big Warlock]

Of course I didn't. :)
No shit. I did tell you that I charge Christmas present interest from the date of notification of said present up to the point of its' arrival and acceptance. :D :D :D
Then again, I can understand how much work goes into getting that 65' Viking custom painted with a "JORDYADO" so I'll let you slide. ;)
Oh, and presents that were designated as Christmas presents also aren't accepted later as birthday presents. Just ask your better half as I'm sure she feels the same way. :)
Man you are scaring me!!!! You sound way, way too much like her!!!! :D

[Big Warlock]

My theory is, that if you don't start drinking in the morning.. it's impossible to drink all day..:)
Would part of the theory be passing out? :D

[DaddyMack]

Would part of the theory be passing out? :D
Pace man Pace!!!!

[Jordy]

Man you are scaring me!!!! You sound way, way too much like her!!!! :D
Probably part of the reason we all get along so well!!! :D :D :D