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View Full Version : Things Not To Say During Sex...



Jetaholic
04-20-2007, 01:55 PM
You might THINK about saying these things, but you wanna refrain from them.
1) But everybody looks funny nekked
2) You woke me up for THAT?
3) Oh, did I mention the video camera?
4) Oh hell baby a little rugburn never hurt anybody
5) Sweetheart did you lock the back door?
6) Can you just pass me the remote control?
7) Do you accept Visa?
8) On second thought, let's turn off the lights
7) And to think I was really tryin' to pick up your friend
8) Gee I hope you're as good looking when I'm sober
9) You get any of the premium movie channels?
10) Smile, you're on candid camera
11) I thought YOU had the keys to the handcuffs!!!
12) When is this supposed to feel good?
13) Wow baby you're good enough to do this for a livin'!
14) You sure I don't know you from somewhere?
15) I wish you got the Playboy channel cause uh...
16) That leak better be from the waterbed
17) I told you it wouldn't work without batteries
18) No really, I do this part better myself
19) Did I tell you my aunt Martha died in this bed?
20) Is that you or is your matress stuffed with rotten potatoes?
21) It sure is nice being in bed with a woman I don't have to inflate or blow up
22) Wow you're almost as good as my ex...
23) What tampon?
24) Have you ever considered lyposuction?
25) Now you ain't gon' tell no one is ya?
26) Did I mention my transsexual operation?
27) I really hate women that actually think sex means somethin'
28) Oh hell a good plastic surgeon will take care of that in no time
29) I'm gonna need another beer for this
30) So...when would you like to meet my parents?
31) Have you seen Fatal Attraction?
32) Oh don't mind me I always file my nails in bed
33) Hey uh....sorry 'bout the name tags I'm just not good with names
34) Will you keep it down? Daddy's a light sleeper
35) You know my old girlfriend used to do it a lot longer
36) You mean you're NOT my blind date?
And my personal favorite...
37) How long do you plan to be "almost there"?
If you're a woman...
1) Try not to smear my makeup will ya?
2) I want a baby
3) I think you've got it on backwards
4) Oh God did I remember to take my pill let me think...

Mr. Crusader 83
04-20-2007, 02:10 PM
:sleeping:

topless
04-20-2007, 02:16 PM
R U N?

NashvilleBound
04-20-2007, 02:33 PM
Your MUCH better than your sister!!
or
Your sister is MUCH better than you!!
(depending on how long your wanting to continue;) )

KeepsTheBeerAfloat
04-20-2007, 07:25 PM
Is that your Mom coming home? Well invite her in, there's enough for her too!!
or if you wanna really mess it up when you're going for the back door...
Come on, take it like a man!!
LOL.:crossx:

work2play
04-20-2007, 07:36 PM
Beige. I think we'll paint the ceiling beige.

bignet
04-20-2007, 08:22 PM
Does it always smell like this?:eek:
:devil:
bignet

racecar.hotshoe
04-20-2007, 09:42 PM
you got change for a ten........:jawdrop: :D

lewiville
04-21-2007, 06:57 AM
"thats not what Roger said you would do":eek:

Keith E. Sayre
04-23-2007, 02:34 PM
Are you through yet??
and if her eyes are closed, "who are you doin????"

MR.rvrluvr
04-23-2007, 02:38 PM
you look like my sister....:D :D

Jbb
04-23-2007, 03:02 PM
:eek:
http://www.***boat.com/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=29301&stc=1&d=1177369325
:D

Baja Big Dog
04-23-2007, 03:44 PM
Can I introduce you to my little friend Mr . Sanchez???:eek:

JetStalker
04-25-2007, 12:48 AM
Or after sex... Soooo... You goin home now?

FOREVER2DOXIES
04-25-2007, 10:51 AM
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwww....how CUTE!!

OGShocker
04-25-2007, 11:52 AM
"What do you think your mom would say".....?:eek: