CARLSON-JET
04-21-2007, 11:38 AM
You may not know this, but many nonliving things have a gender.
Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything
in, but you can see right through them.
Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it
takes a while to warm them up again. They are effective
reproductive devices if the right buttons are pushed,
but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
A Tire is Male, because it sometimes goes bald and it
can easily become over-inflated.
A Water Faucet is Female, because it can turn hot or
cold in just a matter of moments.
A Safety Pin is Male, because it is often useful in an emergency.
A Foreign Movie is Female, because it is not always
completely understood.
A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because,
to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it,
and of course, there's the hot air part.
Sponges are Female, because they're soft,
squeezable and retain water.
Matches are Male, because scratching is important to them.
A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on.
A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick women up.
An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.
A Hammer is Male because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.
A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it'd be male, didn't you? But consider this --- it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!
Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything
in, but you can see right through them.
Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it
takes a while to warm them up again. They are effective
reproductive devices if the right buttons are pushed,
but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed.
A Tire is Male, because it sometimes goes bald and it
can easily become over-inflated.
A Water Faucet is Female, because it can turn hot or
cold in just a matter of moments.
A Safety Pin is Male, because it is often useful in an emergency.
A Foreign Movie is Female, because it is not always
completely understood.
A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because,
to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it,
and of course, there's the hot air part.
Sponges are Female, because they're soft,
squeezable and retain water.
Matches are Male, because scratching is important to them.
A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on.
A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick women up.
An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom.
A Hammer is Male because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around.
A Remote Control is Female. Ha! You thought it'd be male, didn't you? But consider this --- it gives a man pleasure, he'd be lost without it, and while he doesn't always know the right buttons to push, he keeps trying!