Failed pickup lines

[LaveyJet]

Some are good, some are groaners.
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty?
Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine?
Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living?
Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?
Woman: Do not enter.
Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd die laughing.
Man: Your body is like a temple.
Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.
Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?

[HavaSkank]

"Is that a Tic Tac in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?"

[sigepmock]

Wow ...you don't sweat much for a fat girl.:devil: :D

[b's sanger]

You're almost as pretty as your sister...

[HavaSkank]

"Excuse me, is this face taken?"

[thatguy]

"Honest Baby, all the grown ups do it!"

[HavaSkank]

"You should wear my ass as a hat"

[Ziggy]

So I suppose asking for a BlowJob is out of the question......
Oh wait, that one worked :D :D I'll have to rethink this question:idea:

[adjones419]

Nice shoes, wanna f*ck?

[hotlavey]

Didn't we go to different schools together?

[HavaSkank]

"wanna come home with me and play with the box my kids came in?"

[H2O]

One that's guaranteed NOT to work....
Does this look infected to you?

[WYRD]

"wanna come home with me and play with the box my kids came in?"
perhaps you should change this to "the box your kids were delivered in":D :D

[mbrown2]

"wanna come home with me and play with the box my kids came in?"
That's good.

[WYRD]

One that's guaranteed NOT to work....
Does this look infected to you?
Its not herpies if its everywhere:D

[Legal Chemistry]

Just pop the puss, it makes it slide better.
:yuk:

[plaster dave]

Ha baby you want to dance?
No!!!
What do you mean No???
I dont want to dance.
I said you look Fat In Those Pants!!!!
I watch a drunk friend use this one once it was so funny.:D

[HavaSkank]

"Cornhole me if Im wrong, but is your name Humberto?"

[Nord]

"I just wanted to let you know........that I am very beautiful";)
"Aids...........glad I beat that":notam: :jawdrop:

[R.A.D.man]

Hey there, do you know the difference between dinner and a blow job?
No
Well then, we should get together for dinner sometime.

[HM]

"wanna come home with me and play with the box my kids came in?"
Is that a pickup line from the south? eeewwwwweeeee.

[MKEELINE]

Does this look too big for my body?

[Baja Big Dog]

Can we do it if the rubber covers the scabs???:D

[Baja Big Dog]

Dam...I left my Magnums at home!!!

[INSman]

Is that a mirror on your jeans cause I can see myself in your pants ...

[HM]

Sugar, you are finer than a new set of snow tires.

[HavaSkank]

"You find genitals warts sexy....right?"

[HM]

Why does it matter that I banged Havaskank?

[WYRD]

"You find genitals warts sexy....right?"
Its ribbed for her pleasure:jawdrop:

[DeltaSigBoater]

Excuse me, but it is Duck Season or Rabbit Season :D

[Jordy]

Don't be picky, I wasn't. :D

[HM]

You make me feel funny, like when I climb the rope in gym class.

[HavaSkank]

Why does it matter that I banged Havaskank?
All the cool kids are doing it

[adjones419]

You make me feel funny, like when I climb the rope in gym class.
classic Garth Algar!

[WYRD]

Why dont you just give in and blow my load, you know you want too

[wright27]

Can I stir your drink? Mind if I use my dick?
I just shit into my pants. Can I get into yours?

[photo chick]

Don't be picky, I wasn't. :D
I bet that went over well...........:rolleyes:
You must be the reason for global warming because you’re hot

[DeltaSigBoater]

Look, either way I'm getting off to your image, I think it would be better if you were actually there!

[photo chick]

Can I read your T shirt in brail?

[adjones419]

I just shit into my pants. Can I get into yours?
I'm using that one tonight. I'll let you know how it works out.

[photo chick]

What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper.
heard that one once...

[CPBRIAN10THMTN]

Did it hurt?
chick: did what hurt?
when you fell from heaven?
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Ya know, that shirt would look alot better on my bedroom floor
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do you wash your pants with windex cuz i can see myself in them
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Did you get those pants at Macy's? They would be even better if they were half off
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Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes
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Do you have a bandaid? Cuz I'm cut!(flex)
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Do I really need to buy you a drink or can i just give you them money and we can go back to my place?

[Jordy]

I bet that went over well...........:rolleyes:
You were there. Seemed to work out just fine. ;)

[photo chick]

You were there. Seemed to work out just fine. ;)
Oh that's right, I was watching..........I remember you screaming when you realized she was a man... :eek: ;)

[Cheap Thrills]

My magic watch says you're not wearing any panties !
OH ! You are ?
Damn thing must be running fast again.
T.

[wright27]

I'm using that one tonight. I'll let you know how it works out.
I actually think it will work out for you quite nicely.:D