warning labels on alcohol containers

[Mrs Big Boy Toys]

Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor
manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following
warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell
happened to your bra and panties.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering
when you are not.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a
retard.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends
over and over again that you love them.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can
sing.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that
ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically
converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable
rug burns on the forehead , knees and lower back.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are
laughing WITH you.
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
WARNING: the crumsumpten of alcohol may Mack you tink you can tip real
gode.
WHY ARE SOME OF THESE SOOOO FAMILIAR.
I thought someone might get a kick out of this... :)

[Mandelon]

They're going to have to make the bottles a lot bigger to fit those long labels on!

[Sleek-Jet]

Warning - Don't drink and park. Accidents cause people.

[HOOTER SLED-]

Damn, I could of avoided some of the results of those situations, had those been on there sooner. Dammit, I'm gonna sue somebody!!! :D :D :D

[Jordy]

Mandelon:
They're going to have to make the bottles a lot bigger to fit those long labels on! Bigger bottles? Right on. :D

[nhbuoy]

Drink up...It makes OTHER people more interesting...

[LUVNLIFE]

Boy that's funny I don't remember any of those things happening to me. Wait a minute maybe..... no way.

[Blown 472]

The more she drinks, the better I look.