I just got one of those funny telemarketing calls.... [Archive]

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hd&boatrider

10-09-2003, 01:38 PM

I just got one of those calls from the east coast stockbrokers. I said I am not interested and....
he "Do you consider yourself a sucessful business man?"
me "Do you? You are just a telemarketer"
he "Don't answer me with a question."
me "What are you some kind of a bitch?"
he "I will come down there and break your ****ing face up"
me "**** you"
end of call.....lol

Ziggy

10-09-2003, 01:43 PM

Typical hot headed Stock Brokers...they always seem to call when stuff is tough on them then bag on you.
My response is usually along the lines of: You called me, I didn't call you to buy shit(click). I can talk fast too when I want to :D :D

mbrown2

10-09-2003, 01:52 PM

Funny thread....
I hate Telemarketers.....I am quick to say add me to your do not call list"....my wife says you should not be so mean...blah,blah...sales make the world go round" and then I start to get a little conscience....my own company makes money from calling...if all were like me...we might be out of business...NOT....anyway, wonder how others handle the constant flood of calls and if I am being rude...

RandyH

10-09-2003, 01:52 PM

I have heard that if you hand the phone to your two year old it works even better. :D
Randy

BajaMike

10-09-2003, 01:56 PM

Caller ID and answering machines work great...I don't answer calls who use "caller ID Blocking"...they are usually telemarketers.
And the answering machine screens the ones I don't answer.
idea
Mike

Ziggy

10-09-2003, 01:59 PM

Another secret I learned was with those automated calls---if you have to say hello a second time its one of them, if no one answers after your first hello hang up.

hd&boatrider

10-09-2003, 01:59 PM

BajaMike:
Caller ID and answering machines work great...I don't answer calls who use "caller ID Blocking"...they are usually telemarketers.
And the answering machine screens the ones I don't answer.
idea
Mike Mike---You have too many hi-tech toys...lol

Dave C

10-09-2003, 02:01 PM

Thats funny.
I try to anticipate their question and give them the answer they dont want.
Do you consider yourself a successful businessman? No, I kinda suck
So do you want to buy what Im peddling? Already have one
So how much do you have in the market? $5
Are you happy with your current telephone service? Elated.
Do you want to refi @ 0.002% interest. No I refid with .001% already.
Etc.etc.
This works well for jury duty too.
Yes as a matter of fact I do harbor deep-seeded hatred towards _________ (fill in blank)
[ October 09, 2003, 03:02 PM: Message edited by: Dave C ]

hd&boatrider

10-09-2003, 02:02 PM

mbrown2:
Funny thread....
I hate Telemarketers.....I am quick to say add me to your do not call list"....my wife says you should not be so mean...blah,blah...sales make the world go round" and then I start to get a little conscience....my own company makes money from calling...if all were like me...we might be out of business...NOT....anyway, wonder how others handle the constant flood of calls and if I am being rude... I don't mind the calls...I really don't but if they don't accept a "not interested" response it is time to be rude. Or you can just hang up on them. I sometimes play with those stock guys like that because I know they are a timebomb. I never start it but can match their rudeness when appropriate.
My business does not make telemarketing calls by the way. We only make follow up calls on serivces we have provided to make sure things are right.

fourspeednup

10-09-2003, 02:15 PM

If it's a woman, ask the following questions:
-How tall?
-How much do you weigh?
-What size boobs?
-How old?
-How about Friday at 8?
If its a guy ask him out. Hopefully it will freak him out right good and he won't call again!
.....Ooooh I'm gonna get sh!t for this one.....

riverbound

10-09-2003, 02:22 PM

I got one the other day that the telemarketer spoke spanish and very little broken english. So I tried to sell him my old english books from college.

hd&boatrider

10-09-2003, 02:26 PM

riverbound:
I got one the other day that the telemarketer spoke spanish and very little broken english. So I tried to sell him my old english books from college. That was funny....I have to remember that one :)

CA Stu

10-09-2003, 02:48 PM

I have bought several times over the phone from people that were interesting enough if I could use their product or services. I have bought insurance, magazine subscriptions, and I'm sure some other stuff from people that called me. Angels 21 game ticket packs spring to mind.
It's fashionable to "hate telemarketers" these days.
Just like any business, there's legit ones and dirty ones.
I reckon HD has the right attitude, if I'm not interested, I just say "not interested" and waste them.
If their pitch is weak, I say "Your pitch is weak and you sound like you're in a tunnel".
I did have a 5 or 6 call episode with a stockbroker from back east named John Macarello. I thought Johnny Mackerel was a great pitch name, and the guy had a great pitch. The two stock tips he gave me were big winners (in retrospect, at that time, any tech stock was a big winner).
Of course I just tracked them and didn't buy them :( but they both came out way ahead. Finally I had to break him off when he gave me the old "I showed you some winners, right? Now I want you to open an account with us...." But it was fun while it lasted.
If they have something interesting, I say "How much?" and then always haggle with them. They'll all drop price or sweeten the pot somehow.
Truth is, I'd rather get 5 telemarketers calling me than have my brother in law calling to borrow money ...
CA Stu

91nordic29

10-09-2003, 03:54 PM

telemarketers are always trying to get by me to speak to my boss (the owner). the try everything. some are even downright nasty ( had to call the cops, phone company etc...)
they try every tactic including intimidation (does your boss know that you are insulting your prospective clients?) me: perspective clients usually answer my questions and dont threaten me! click. they dont like you wasting THEIR time. as if!!

Racing Ray

10-09-2003, 04:15 PM

Just keep one of those spare air horns you have for the boat close to the phone. They never call back.

Ziggy

10-09-2003, 04:25 PM

Another tactic my sister-in-law uses is to put the phone down in front of radio with elevator music on(or classic works too) and go on with your biz...call is on their nickel and they can't disconnect even if they hang up, if they do it'll stay connected each time the pick up again.
After a good while she'll go hang the phone up.

RiverToysJas

10-09-2003, 04:37 PM

fourspeednup:
If it's a woman, ask the following questions:
-How tall?
-How much do you weigh?
-What size boobs?
-How old?
-How about Friday at 8?
If its a guy ask him out. Hopefully it will freak him out right good and he won't call again!
.....Ooooh I'm gonna get sh!t for this one..... That's good but I usually add....
so what'cha wearin'??? You sound sexy. Ever try anal beads? How do you feel about three-somes with farm animals? Keep it going that direction and they'll be hanging up on you!!! wink
RTJas :D

fourspeednup

10-09-2003, 04:49 PM

Now that's what I'm talkin about!

fourspeednup

10-09-2003, 04:51 PM

Doh, a little premature on the post.
Just remember, it's not sexual harrassment if she called you!

burbanite

10-10-2003, 06:19 AM

mbrown2:
anyway, wonder how others handle the constant flood of calls and if I am being rude... No call list, haven't had a call in more than a year.
Peace at last...

hd&boatrider

10-10-2003, 07:10 AM

burbanite:
mbrown2:
anyway, wonder how others handle the constant flood of calls and if I am being rude... No call list, haven't had a call in more than a year.
Peace at last... I am on the DNCL and I also tell them not to call back but that is when things go south....lol They just don't get it for the most part. I don't have the time to pursue any legal action against them either.