joke

[spectratoad]

http://www.gambits.com/politics/kerry-two-face.jpg

[spectratoad]

ok now for the real reason I started the joke thread
Two friends are discussing politics on Election Day, each trying to no avail to convince the other to switch sides. Finally, one says to the other: ``Look, it's clear that we are unalterably opposed on every political issue. Our votes will surely cancel out. Why not save ourselves some time and both agree to not vote today?'' The other agrees enthusiastically and they part. Shortly after that, a friend of the first one who had heard the conversation says, ``That was a sporting offer you made.'' ``Not really,`` says the second. ``This is the third time I've done this today``.

[eliminatedsprinter]

Not bad. I like it.

[JetBoatRich]

Dan Rather of CBS news was seated next to little Tommy on the plane
when Rather turned to the boy and said, "Let's talk, I've heard that
flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passengers.
Little Tommy, who had just opened his book, closed it slowly, and
said to Rather, "What would you like to discuss?"
"Oh, I don't know" said Rather, "How about politics? Should we keep
Bush as president or elect Kerry?"
"OK" said Little Tommy, "That could be an interesting topic but let me
ask you a question first. A horse, a cow and a deer all eat grass. The same stuff. Yet a deer excretes little pellets, while a cow turns out flat pattys, and a horse excretes clumps of dried grass. Why do you think that is?"
"Jeez" said Rather, "I have no idea."
"Well then" said Little Tommy, How is it you feel qualified to discuss
who should run this country when you don't know shit?"