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Thread: My girlfriend's dog is an asshole

  1. #1
    sorry dog
    Unfortunately he is also smart for a dog (13 year old rott/lab mix). He can open gates, doors, and garbage lids. Also is very good at not getting directly caught sleeping in my bed and on leather couch. I figger it out later from the filth and rips in the sheets his claws make when he is chewing on his asshole.
    I'd kick him outside, but he's even better at causing problems out there. He once ripped her dad's satellite dish off the house in protest of not being let in. I once hooked up some wire and a small cattle charger on top of the bed on got him good a couple of times but apparently he's figgered out when that's not around.
    Not sure what to do now except up the voltage.

  2. #2
    dmontzsta
    lol sounds like a movie.

  3. #3
    Tom Brown
    I recommend a gasoline enema.

  4. #4
    Senior Member
    Join Date
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    10,871
    I figger it out later from the filth and rips in the sheets his claws make when he is chewing on his asshole. I once hooked up some wire and a small cattle charger on top of the bed on got him good a couple of times but apparently he's figgered out when that's not around.
    Sounds like a real comfortable place you got there SD. :squiggle:

  5. #5
    sorry dog
    He also bitten me a few times... but I can't get too mad since I hit him first.
    He knows how to get in through a locked door... takes a 60 minutes for him to eat his way through.
    Definately reminds me of Turner and Hooch sometimes.

  6. #6
    sorry dog
    Sounds like a real comfortable place you got there SD. :squiggle:
    It's actually much better since I kicked the cat outside...but I'll save that rant for another night.

  7. #7
    Tom Brown
    Not sure what to do now except up the voltage.
    Why not lock him in that burnt out Fargo pickup that's blocking the front steps?

  8. #8
    sorry dog
    I like the pickup.
    Oh. Forgot to mention another talent the dog has...
    He can emit some of the most potent stinkers known to man. I swear that you can actually see them. The toxicity levels definately require you to leave the room for a while.

  9. #9
    slingingsmoke
    Nice. Blame it on the dog......LOL

  10. #10
    sorry dog
    I wish a could fart that good.
    You could probably run a lawnmower engine if you ran a tube from the carb to the dog's ass.

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