Excuses for calling in sick.

[HCS]

Right off of MSN but pretty funny.
I was sprayed by a skunk.
I tripped over my dog and was knocked unconscious.
My bus broke down and was held up by robbers.
I was arrested as a result of mistaken identity.
I forgot to come back to work after lunch.
I couldn't find my shoes.
I hurt myself bowling.
I was spit on by a venomous snake.
I totaled my wife's jeep in a collision with a cow.
A hitman was looking for me.
My curlers burned my hair and I had to go to the hairdresser.
I eloped.
My brain went to sleep and I couldn't wake it up.
My cat unplugged my alarm clock.
I had to be there for my husband's grand jury trial.
I had to ship my grandmother's bones to India.
I forgot what day of the week it was.
Someone slipped drugs in my drink last night.
A tree fell on my car.
My monkey died.
I had to post on Hot Boat all day.

[topless]

A tree fell on my car.
:Not funny. A tree really did fall on my car a couple years ago. I called the fire department who wouldn't do anything until I lied and said there were live electrical wires all over the street so they came out and at least chain sawed the damn thing off my car so I could get out of the drive way. The bad thing is that it was a city tree and they claimed that this incident was an act of God so I asked them if it was the same God that they won't let my children pray to in school.

[uvindex]

... so I asked them if it was the same God that they won't let my children pray to in school. LMAO (if I was the city guy I would have said, "no, that's a different God" just to push your buttons.

[HCS]

Not funny. A tree really did fall on my car a couple years ago. I called the fire department who wouldn't do anything until I lied and said there were live electrical wires all over the street so they came out and at least chain sawed the damn thing off my car so I could get out of the drive way. The bad thing is that it was a city tree and they claimed that this incident was an act of God so I asked them if it was the same God that they won't let my children pray to in school.
You didn't remind them of the separation of church and state.

[topless]

You didn't remind them of the separation of church and state. I sued the city because my car was totalled. I lost of course and the judge said the same thing.....act of God. I guess that is their way of laying the blame elsewhere. Do you suppose Katrina was an act of God too or Bush's fault?

[Her454]

I was sprayed by a skunk.
I tripped over my dog and was knocked unconscious.
I was spit on by a venomous snake.
I totaled my Truck in a collision with a cow.

All VALID reasons, and the dog one was reason enough for almost 3 months off work LOL.

[charlyox]

How about saying you have "anal gloucma" because "I can't see my ass coming to work"

[Parker Dreamin]

I had somebody call me the other day...
" I dont have any gas in my car and I have no money"

[Miss Perfect]

I had somebody call me the other day...
" I dont have any gas in my car and I have no money"
OMG, that is a daily excuse for the winners that work at my company.

[Blown Spectra]

I had somebody call me the other day...
" I dont have any gas in my car and I have no money"
:sleeping: lol