Being Seperated

[MsDrmr]

I have been seperated now for about 8 mos. I am making strides to move on in my life though finding it hard. Is there anyone out there that can suggest ways to help end the feelings of hurt?

[MagicMtnDan]

Get therapy! Seriously. If you're like many you'll blame yourself and a therapist will help you deal with those feelings and come to really understand that it takes two to make a relationship work and only one to screw it up.
Get some professional help - see a therapist and talk to him/her and after a while you'll start feeling better about what you've been through and start rebuilding your self-confidence.
It's all about how you feel about yourself.
And don't forget that even when you're "ready" to start dating again you're not going to be ready for a while (so don't get serious about the first person you date - it most likely won't work).
Good luck!

[riverbound]

In the same boat.....and dont know what to tell you. I have kept myself surrounded by friends and family to keep me busy, seems to help. but I think time is the only thing that will help. It seems every day gets a little better, but it will be a while. If you find the "magic" solution let me know.

[scarabrick2]

I'm going thru a divorce right now(finished in a few weeks). It sucks! I got blind sided by my wife with this one. Been married for 7.5 yrs(faithfully) and have a 4 yr old son. I haven't dated anyone for 9yrs and I know it's not going to be easy. Just remember to stay close to your friend and family and keep a positive attitude. Enjoy life to it's fullest and try to move on without being resentfull. Go have fun with people that are close to you. There's more support out there than you think. Everyone I talk to about my situation says keep the faith and keep your chin up.
Rick
Las Vegas

[76ANTHONY]

In the same boat.....and dont know what to tell you. I have kept myself surrounded by friends and family to keep me busy, seems to help. but I think time is the only thing that will help. It seems every day gets a little better, but it will be a while. If you find the "magic" solution let me know.
I GOT THE MAGIC SOLUTION FOR YA, get your ass to the meetings on time

[lucky]

Get out and date .. even if they are Man whores .. who cares - If you sit idle, you only ponder - get out younder - then you won't wonder ???
The best thing for me was to jump right back into dating , Since my ex was cheating - It Was quite rewarding - when she found out that I was dating fine ass ladies , with alot more to offer .. I now find closer in the fact that - she has not grown - and I would like to think she has regrets ...
turn the hurt into a positiver FOR YOURSELF..... Chris

[MsDrmr]

Thanks guys, I know there are a lot of individuals here going through a similar situation, it's tough no matter what sex you are. I too was blind sided by this and it's been tough, each day I do move forward a bit...but it's a slow process.

[***boateditor]

I have been seperated now for about 8 mos. I am making strides to move on in my life though finding it hard. Is there anyone out there that can suggest ways to help end the feelings of hurt?
One word: "Mrs.***boateditor."

[LHC30Victory]

Remember that a seperation/divorce is second in emotional trauma only to a close family death. Both situations can be helped by professional counseling - so make sure you take advantage of that. It will help you make sense of the events. Just surrounding yourself with family CAN BE a method of denial, so while it is important to give you a reason to go forward, be careful that it isn't holding you back.
Exercise will counter a lot of the bad feelings, so feel free to get lost in a good, hard workout. I know of several counselors who, as a matter of therapy, prescribe exercise along with talking.
And, remember you are not alone and can call on many people here when things get tough.

[BiggusJimbus]

The main thing it will take is time.
Aside from therapy, the best advice given so far is to stay close to your friends and family and not sit idle. Go out and do the things you enjoy.
The best time and place to meet the kind of people you want to be with in the future is to meet them doing the things that you enjoy.
Bars and clubs are fun, but don't expect to meet the kind of people that you want to spend your life with.
Good Luck. You'll be OK.