> I used to have a Labrador Retriever so I was buying a large bag
> of Purina at Wal-Mart one day and was in line to check out.
>
> A woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
>
> On impulse, I told her "no" but that I was starting The Purina
Diet
> again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the
> hospital the last time I was on the diet but I HAD lost 50 pounds
> before I awakened in the Intensive Care Unit with tubes coming out
> of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
> it works is that you load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets
and
> simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. Plus the food is
> nutritionally complete so I was going to try the diet again.
>
> I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was
by
> now enthralled with my story, particularly a tall, biker who was
> behind the lady.
>
> Horrified, the woman asked me if I'd ended up in the ER because
I'd
> been poisoned by the Purina. I told her "no."
> Actually I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car
> hit me.
>
> I thought the biker was going to have to stagger out the door.