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Thread: Toothpicks

  1. #1
    Tom Brown
    We've got this guy at work who is a little light in the personal grooming department. He's somewhat overweight (5'7", 275 lbs), shaped like a pear, always wears the same pair of pants and suspenders, and I think he only has two shirts. He doesn't stink so I assume he bathes, at least.
    He's a little light in the area of oral hygiene also. He's missing one front tooth and the ones that are left look to have had some hard miles. They stick out at an angle so while he's not buck toothed, he's not far from it.
    Anyway, I had never eaten with him until recently. It's a treat.
    He leans over the table and scarfs down the food like a pack of wolves. That's cool enough but what's a little less cool is that 8 seconds after he starts eating, that is: when he's done eating, he pulls out a toothpick and goes to work.
    He doesn't use regular toothpicks. He's got some special ones. These are the sequoia of toothpicks. Each is a mighty timber.
    Anyway, he has enough of an overbite that he just opens his mouth and jams one of these railway ties into his upper dental work and flicks it away from his mouth. Anyone sitting across from him ends up peppered with plaque shrapnel and little globules of chewed but undigested food. It's something to look at.

  2. #2
    great story haha....thanks for sharing.

  3. #3
    And this is the little woman I presume?...

  4. #4
    Tom Brown
    His teeth look so much like that, it's scary. Seriously... he could use some bridge work and sucheres to keep his lips together.

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