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Thread: Cops

  1. #1
    Debbolas
    Thanks for keeping us safe
    My cousin in Illinois (who is a cop) sent this to me................
    You know you're a cop if ...
    1)You have the bladder capacity of five people.
    2)You have ever restrained someone and it was not a sexual experience.
    3)You believe that 50% of people are a waste of good air.
    4)Your idea of a good time is a gun run or a car chase.
    5)You conduct a criminal record check on anyone who seems friendly towards you.
    6)You believe in the aerial spraying of Prozac and birth control pills.
    7)You disbelieve 90% of what you hear and 75% of what you see.
    8)You have your weekends off planned for a year.
    9)You believe the government should require a permit to reproduce.
    10)You refer to your favorite restaurant by the intersection at which it's
    located.
    11)You have ever wanted to hold a seminar entitled:
    "Suicide...getting it right the first time."
    12)You ever had to put the phone on hold before you begin laughing
    uncontrollably.
    13)You think caffeine should be available in IV form.
    14)You believe anyone who says, "I only had two beers" is going to blow more than a .15
    15)You find out a lot about paranoia just by following people around.
    16)Anyone has ever said to you, "There are people killing other people out there and you are here messing with me."
    17)People flag you down on the street and ask you directions to strange places...and you know where it's located.
    18)You can discuss where you are going to eat with your partner while standing over a dead body.
    19)You are the only person introduced at social gatherings by profession.
    20)You walk into places and people think it's high comedy to seize their buddy and shout, "They've come to get you, Bill."
    21)You do not see daylight from November until May.
    22)People shout, "I didn't do it!" when you walk into a room and think they're
    being hugely funny and original.
    23)A week's worth of laundry consists of 5 T-shirts, 5 pairs of socks, and 5
    pairs of underwear.
    24)You've ever referred to Tuesday as "my weekend", or "this is my Friday".
    25)You've ever written off guns and ammunition as a business deduction.
    26)You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, it
    sure is quiet tonight."
    27)Discussing dismemberment over a meal seems perfectly normal to you.
    28)You find humor in other people's stupidity.
    29)You have left more meals on the restuarant table than you've eaten.
    30)You feel good when you hear "these handcuffs are too tight".

  2. #2
    badtaste
    nicely done!

  3. #3
    Flyinbowtie
    That there is a true story.

  4. #4
    clownpuncher
    Good stuff, true too.
    I have a riddle for ya's............................
    What do cops and firemen have in common?
    They both wanted to be firemen when they grew up
    LOLOLOLOLOLOL, I kill me!
    I for one am a huge supporter of are men and women in blue (or tan, green etc)
    God bless em all

  5. #5
    Newcastle
    How true is this email...too funny.
    Good post Deb...

  6. #6
    kp216
    26)You believe that unspeakable evils will befall you if anyone says, "Boy, it sure is quiet tonight."
    Actually saying aloud that could cause a person to get their ass kicked! :220v:

  7. #7
    Debbolas
    Good stuff, true too.
    I have a riddle for ya's............................
    What do cops and firemen have in common?
    They both wanted to be firemen when they grew up
    LOLOLOLOLOLOL, I kill me!
    I for one am a huge supporter of are men and women in blue (or tan, green etc)
    God bless em all
    LOL, ya crack me up too!!!

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